The Confession

“So glad we caught that son of a bitch,” River repeated beside him as they approached the glittering lights of LA. “He’s going to be really damn surprised when his soon-to-be ex-wife presents those indisputable pictures in court. And damn, for an older guy, he’s got game. And a really limber back.”

“No doubt,” Seth said absently, glad they’d put this fucking case to bed. But now that they had, a mountain of other problems was waiting for him.

“What’s funny is, the last time we were in a hotel room, exposing someone’s sex life, I had to take one for the team. I’m so glad I was behind the camera this time.” River slapped him on the shoulder, grinning through the shadowy dark.

Seth did his best to snap out of his stupor. “For sure. Too bad we can’t introduce our client’s husband to Marlie.”

“Exactly. Since he’s a cheating jackass and she’s a manipulative whore willing to spread her legs to see the man who spurned her go to prison, they deserve each other. It would be a race to see who could fuck the other over the fastest.”

River wasn’t wrong, so Seth nodded. “When we get to the office, I’ll call the client and send her the pics. You go on home.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, we’re less than an hour away, so I got it. I’m assuming you and Dean have big plans to cozy up in his hospital bed.” He winked. “Going to try to sneak a woman in between you?”

“Fuck no. He’s been discharged, but he’s still recovering, so he’s not up to banging any woman, between us or otherwise. And that’s cool. I’ve got more than easy pussy on my mind.”

“You’ve got a specific pussy on your mind, I’ll bet. Pike’s girlfriend?”

River’s expression turned thunderous. “Why won’t he just go the fuck away?”

“Maybe for the same reason I wouldn’t stay in New York when I’m sure Beck wanted me to. Feelings, man. You can’t escape them. When you’ve got them for a girl—”

“I don’t. I just want to talk to her.”

“Uh-huh. You keep telling yourself that.”

River shrugged him off and changed the subject. “So are you going to head home and have a fucking good night after you call the client?”

Seth shook his head. “I’ve got some paperwork to finish and a few inquiries to follow up on. Kiddie Kares sent me a few more background checks, so I’ll probably start those.”

“I can do that, man.”

“I got it. I’m…um, giving Beck’s brother a little time to settle in.”

“Zach is living with you?”

“Yeah, at least for a while.” It hadn’t been Seth’s first choice. Then again, the house they lived in belonged to Beck. Since the surgeon paid for it, Seth could hardly tell him who should and shouldn’t stay there.

“That guy has had it rough.”

More than River would ever understand. The loss, the sense of failure, the suddenly feeling adrift, of having his whole life change in the blink of an eye through every fault of his own. How long would Zach second-guess his decision to cross The Chosen and try to save his daughter from hell only to lose her for good? Seth’s guess? The rest of his life.

“Yeah.”

And therein lay Seth’s problem. Just looking at Zach brought back all the worst of his memories after Autumn’s and Tristan’s deaths. All his guilt, remorse, and contrition. The harsh, inescapable reality that it was too late to make different choices. The knowledge that the suburban home he’d scrimped and stretched financially to buy for his little family was nothing but an empty house haunted by memories he couldn’t bear to confront. Even looking at Zach’s tormented expression reminded him of looking in the mirror after his world had fallen apart and the police had been unable to come up with any hard evidence to prove who’d killed them. He remembered staring at his reflection and vowing to find the truth himself, then to kill the dirty motherfucker responsible. He’d turned in his badge in disgust and struck out on his own. He’d never forget the seedy clubs he’d visited, the dirty mobsters he’d confronted, or the low-down deal he’d made with the king of the Russian underworld in New York just to find some resolution.

He’d fucking tried to tranquilize his grief with booze and drugs, with anonymous fights and even more anonymous fucks. He’d become someone his family hadn’t recognized, someone they had feared. Hell, he’d even become someone he hadn’t liked.

But he’d finally found the answers he sought, meted out his revenge, laid his wife and son to rest for good, then tried to pick up the shattered pieces of his life. Until he’d met Heavenly, he’d only been taking up air and marking time. Now that he had her and he shared a great kinship with Beck, he had a reason to live again. He didn’t want to fuck that up.

If you love them, don’t you owe them your trust and your truth? Give them some answers…

So they could look at him like he was a violent monster? No. Beck had exposed his secret to everyone, and no wonder his loved ones hadn’t blamed him. He’d been born to those fucking religious cult crazies, stuck in the thick of their fanaticism through no fault of his own. He’d had to do something horrible to escape; no denying that. But if Beck hadn’t killed his father, the zealot would have killed him. As far as Seth was concerned, Beck’s act of patricide had been nothing but preemptive self-defense.

His own situation had been merely cocky, self-righteous idiocy.

“You okay?” River frowned.