“Moonshine.”
I frowned. “You’re making moonshine?”
He just grunted as an answer.
“Is that dangerous?”
“Only if the people I sell it to act stupid.”
I shook my head and turned away from the table. “Who do you sell it to? Do they act stupid often?”
Julian leaned against the kitchen counter and crossed his arms over his chest. “Is this why you came?”
I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head. “No. This is a lot to take in, though. Where do you live? There’s nowhere for you to sit or relax.”
“Get to the point, Mallory.”
I held Hank closer and tried to fight the urge to cry. “I just wanted to tell you that Blake and Isaac didn’t know that Hank is your son. I didn’t tell them. I didn’t tell anyone. Not even Kara.”
“What do you want, Mallory? You didn’t want me in Hank’s life, clearly. Why are you here now?”
“I was terrified of bringing you into Hank’s life. My own parents were awful and split up when I was young. I dealt with them fighting over me when neither of them really wanted me. I was scared of making Hank’s life the same. Plus, it seemed like you just wanted a one-night thing, no strings. I was wrong. I should’ve come back here and found you. I should’ve given you the option of being involved. Instead, I shut down and hid. And I’m so sorry for that.
“Then, I met Isaac, and I felt the same connection to him that I felt for you when I first saw you. And then again with Blake. I don’t understand it, and it scares me, too. I care about the three of you. Too much, too fast. But it’s there. I care about you.”
Julian just shook his head and looked away.
“I do. I care about you a lot. Enough to back away from Blake and Isaac if you’re not a part of us. I’m not going to come between the three of you. If you don’t want me after what I did, I understand that. I just… I’m not willing to hurt you more than I already have. And having a relationship with Blake and Isaac like you’re not missing from it would be hurtful. I want the three of you to be okay.
“And I want you to be in Hank’s life.” I looked around at the moonshine operation he was clearly running and winced. “I don’t know this side of you. You were right when you said I don’t really know you. But there are things I do know about you. That I really like. You’re funny and surprisingly gentle. You make me happy.”
“You want me in Hank’s life? Why? Because you’re just so eager to have a man like me around him?”
I moved closer to him, stopping almost immediately when he flinched away, though. “Yes. I want you in his life. And if I can say that while standing in your moonshine operation, you should really believe that I mean it.”
“You have the two good brothers. Go with them and have a great life. I’m fine here.”
I held Hank a little tighter. “Please, don’t send me away. I want you. I know that I messed up, but I want to try again.”
Turning to face me fully, Julian glared at me. “Forget it. Forget me. I hope the three of you live a happy life. He’s their kid now.”
I shook my head. “No. You’re not listening to me. There is no us without you. If I leave this cabin without you, I’m not going back to Blake and Isaac. They can’t replace you as Hank’s father. It doesn’t work that way. So, if you don’t want us, that’s fine, but we’re going back to Kara’s. Alone. I’m not coming between the three of you. So, send me away if you have to, but go make it right with your brothers.”
He shook his head and scrubbed his hand down his face. “You need to leave. I have some customers coming later.”
Tears filled my eyes, and I nodded. “Okay. I’m sorry. This isn’t how I wanted this to end.”
“Yeah, well. Shit happens.”
Anger and hurt whirled around in my head. “Especially when you act like an asshole.”
“Go.”
“I’m going.” I stomped through the house and spun around to glare at him by the door. “I’m so sad for you. You’re hiding from life and happiness up here in this cabin that reeks of old man, and you’re too scared to take a chance on someone loving you. Even your own brothers. You let Grace win. And, having the good fortune of meeting her, that sucks. Have a great fucking meeting, Julian.”