Enticed by His Forgotten Lover (Pregnancy & Passion 1)
Page 13
island. Take him through all the steps they’d taken before.
She wanted him to remember. Because if he didn’t, things would never be the same for them. He’d resisted the idea of being with her. Her only hope was for him to remember and then…
Then just as she’d told him the night before, she’d forever have to live with the fact that at least some part of him recoiled at the idea of them being lovers.
“Penny for your thoughts?”
She grimaced as she navigated her way down the interstate. “They aren’t worth that much.”
“Then don’t think them.”
To her surprise, he leaned over, curled his hand around her nape and massaged lightly, threading his fingers through her thick hair. It was tempting to close her eyes and lean her head all the way back but then they’d have a wreck and never get off this damn interstate.
“I’m nervous, Rafael,” she admitted.
She bit her lip, wondering if she shouldn’t just shut up, but she’d always had this habit of being completely honest. It wasn’t in her makeup to shy away from the bald truth, no matter how uncomfortable. She always figured if people talked more about their issues then there wouldn’t be so many issues.
Rafael—the old Rafael—hadn’t minded her speaking her mind. They’d enjoyed long conversations and she’d always told him what was occupying her thoughts.
But now, she had a newfound reservation against being so forthright. She hated feeling so unsure of herself.
“Why are you nervous?” he asked softly.
“You. Me. Us. What if this doesn’t work? I feel like this is my only chance and that if you don’t remember, I’ve lost you.”
“Regardless of whether I regain my memory, we still have a child to think about. I’m not going to disappear just because I can’t remember the details of his conception.”
“You sound like you’ve accepted that I’m carrying your child.”
He shrugged. “I’ve embraced the very real possibility. Until I’m proven wrong, I choose to think of it as my child.”
Her heart did a little squeeze in her chest. “Thank you for that. For now it’s enough. Until we figure out everything else, it’s enough that you accept our baby.”
“And you.”
She turned to glance quickly at him before returning her gaze to the highway.
He lowered his hand from her neck to cover her hand that rested on his leg. “There is definitely something between us. If I accept that we made a child together, surely I have to accept that we were lovers, that you meant something to me?”
“I hope I did,” she said softly.
“Tell me, Bryony, do you still love me?”
There was a note of raw curiosity in his voice. Almost as if he wasn’t sure how he wanted her to answer.
“That’s unfair,” she said in a low voice. “You can’t expect me to lay everything out when there’s a real possibility we’ll never be what we once were to each other. You can’t expect me to admit to loving a man who thinks of me as a complete stranger.”
“Not a stranger,” he corrected. “I’ve already admitted that it’s obvious we were something to each other.”
“Something. Not everything,” she said painfully. “Don’t ask me, Rafael. Not until you remember me. Ask me then.”
He reached up to touch her cheek. “All right. I’ll ask you then.”
Ten
After what seemed an interminable time, Bryony drove her little car onto the ferry and was immediately sandwiched by vehicles twice the size of hers.
Rafael had serious reservations about her driving around with a newborn in something only a little larger than a Matchbox car.
To his surprise, she opened her door and started to climb out.
“Where are you going?”
She ducked down to look at him through the window and flashed a wide smile. “Come on. It’s a beautiful sunset. We can watch it from the railing.”
Her exuberance shouldn’t have surprised him by now. He’d gotten a taste of it in bits and pieces, but now that they’d left the city, she seemed to be even more excited, as if she couldn’t wait to go back…?.
There was no doubt that he wanted to regain his memory. Having a gaping hole in his mind wasn’t at all acceptable to someone like him, who was used to control in every aspect of his life. Now he was dependent on someone else to guide him and it made him extremely uncomfortable.
But in addition to knowing what happened during those lost weeks, he found himself hoping. Hoping that Bryony was right even if it meant a drastic change for him. He wasn’t at all sure he was ready for fatherhood and a relationship. Love. If Bryony was to be believed… Love. It baffled him and intrigued him all at the same time.
He didn’t want to hurt her. At this point he’d do anything to keep from hurting her and so he hoped that some miracle had occurred on this island and that he’d be able to find that same miracle again.
He climbed out of the car and stretched his aching legs. He inhaled deeply, enjoying the tang of the salty air. A breeze ruffled his hair, but he noted it was a warm breeze despite the coolness of the evening. The air was heavier here but…cleaner, if that made sense.
Bryony, in her impatience—which he was fast learning was an overriding component of her personality—grabbed his hand and tugged him toward the rail where others had gathered. Some had chosen to remain inside their vehicles, but others, like he and Bryony were leaning over the side and staring at the burst of gold on the horizon. Pink-and-purple hues mixed with the strands of gold, and spread out their fingers until the entire sky looked as if it were alive and breathing fire.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”
He glanced down at Bryony and nodded. “Yes, it is.”
“You don’t see too many sunsets,” she said smugly.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
She shrugged. “You mentioned before when we used to sit out on my deck that it wasn’t something you ever had time to do. You usually worked late and were always in too big a hurry. So I was determined to show you as many as I could while you were here. Looks like I get to do it all over again. Oh, look! Dolphins!”
He looked to where she was pointing to see several sleek, gray bodies arc out of the water and then disappear below the surface.
“They follow the ferry quite a bit,” she said. “I look for them every time I make the trip to Galveston.”
He found himself caught up in the moment and before he knew it, he was pointing as they resurfaced. “There they are again!”
She smiled and hooked her arm through his, hugging him close. It seemed the most natural thing in the world to extricate his arm and then wrap it around her. They stood watching as the dolphins raced through the water, with her tucked up close to his side.
He shook his head at the absurdity of it all. Here he was without his phone or an internet connection. He’d left his BlackBerry in the car. He was on a ferry, of all things, watching dolphins play as he held the mother of his child.
Much was said about near-death experiences and how they changed a person. But it would appear that he’d begun his great transformation act before his accident.
It was little wonder Ryan, Dev and Cam were so worried about him. They were probably back in the city researching mental hospitals in preparation for his breakdown.
He rubbed his hand up and down Bryony’s arm and then pressed a kiss to the top of her head. Then he sighed. He had to admit, he was actually looking forward to being on the island and spending time with Bryony and not just because he was anxious to recover his memory.
She wrapped her arms around his waist and squeezed. Her hug warmed him all the way through but not in a particularly sexual way. It was comforting. It was like holding a ray of sunshine.
As strange as it might sound, he felt comfortable around her. A complete stranger. Someone, who before a few days ago, he hadn’t remembered, and for all practical purposes had never laid eyes on
.
Yeah, his statement the night before had been a little—okay, a lot corny—but it was absolutely true. They fit. She fit him. And he had absolutely no explanation for it, other than somehow, he’d lost his heart and soul on that island and then the entire event had been wiped from his mind.
Okay. He accepted it. Hell, he embraced it. He wasn’t fighting it. He was ready for whatever lay ahead. So why couldn’t he remember?
He held her tightly to him, his face buried in her fragrant, dark curls. Tentatively he slid his hand down to cup her belly, the first time he’d made an overt gesture to acknowledge the life inside her womb.
She stiffened momentarily and then slowly turned her face up so she could look at him.
He rubbed in a gentle back-and-forth motion, exploring the firmness of the swell. Something he could only define as magic tightened his chest and flooded his heart.
This was his child.
Somehow he knew it.
He was going to be a father.
The realization befuddled him and at the same time, he felt such a sense of awe. He hadn’t planned on fatherhood. In fact, he’d always been extremely careful in his sexual relationships. Extremely careful. He’d bordered on phobic about an accidental pregnancy.
Had he purposely discarded protection with Bryony? Had he considered the fact that they could make a child? Had she entertained such a possibility?
He frowned as he remembered her outrage and anger that it hadn’t been enough that he’d screwed her over, but that he’d made her pregnant, too. No, that didn’t strike him as the reaction of a woman who’d embraced such a thing.
Evidently it hadn’t been something either of them had planned, but it was also obvious he hadn’t gone to great lengths to prevent it.