Her eyebrows soften.
“I don’t know if you remember, but I waved to you from here, from this front yard. You didn’t wave back. You just stared at me. Then later on, my mom, Leander, Giselle and I came to your house. My mom gave yours an apple pie. Leander smiled and said hi to you, and in a few seconds, you were won over. You didn’t even see me. I was invisible from that moment on.”
“I only remember that day vaguely,” Aster says as she looks at her house. “I don’t remember you waving.”
“Of course not.”
“But that’s not true. You weren’t invisible.”
“Really? Because I sure felt like it. To you, at least. Each time you came to the house, it was either Leander or Giselle you were looking for.”
“Because they were friendly. They were kind to me.”
“I gave you all of my Halloween candy once,” I tell her. “After your Mom died, I made you paper cranes and butterflies and left them outside your window.”
Aster’s eyebrows arch. “That was you?”
“I gave your dogs treats because I knew you loved them. I ate the cookies you baked even though they were overcooked and Leander didn’t want them. One Valentine’s Day, you gave Leander a card and you were disappointed he didn’t give you one so I left a rose on your doorstep with a note from him.”
Her jaw drops. “That was all you?”
“Yes,” I confess. “It’s always been me. But you never noticed.”
“I…” Aster touches her forehead and shakes her head in disbelief. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“It’s hard to talk to someone who refuses to see you, don’t you think?”
She presses her hand against her chest. “You could have just come to me and talked to me. I would have listened.”
I shake my head. “You were too busy daydreaming about Leander.”
“I would have listened,” Aster insists. “If only you had come and talked to me…”
“I did try to talk to you once. Before I left for college, remember?”
The look on her face tells me she does.
“I went after you. I tried to comfort you.”
“Comfort me?” Aster’s eyebrows bunch up. “You were teasing me. You kissed me.”
“I did,” I admit. “I couldn’t hold back any longer.”
Aster falls speechless.
“But you slapped me, remember?”
“That’s because of what you said after,” she says.
I give her a puzzled look. “Oh. So you’re saying you liked me kissing you?”
She looks away. I see the rosy tint on her cheeks. She’s blushing?
“I didn’t know what to think of it at the time,” Aster says. “But I didn’t hate it.”
This is a surprise.
“So you just hated me?”
“No.” She looks at me. “I never hated you.”
“But you said – ”
“I just said that because you were saying some mean things. I didn’t mean it. I wanted to take it back, but you were gone and you never came back.”
“Because I had nothing to come back to,” I tell her.
“Your family lives here,” she reminds me. “Your parents.”
“Who, until recently, doted on Leander, their favorite son. Like you, they didn’t see me, either.”
Aster falls silent as her gaze drops to the ground.
“You know, I tried to leave everything behind,” I go on. “I tried to forget about you. But then I came back and I realized I never did. And you were finally seeing me. At least, I thought you were. I thought I finally had a chance. But I was wrong, right? I never had a chance.”
Aster pouts. “Why are you saying that? Because of what you saw just now? I just told you there’s nothing going on between Leander and me. I’ve been telling you – ”
“You had your arms around him,” I point out petulantly.
“Like I said, I was comforting him. I did the same to you when you had that nightmare.”
I realize she did.
“And what’s next? Are you going to have sex with him like you did with me?”
It’s not what I want to say, but my jealousy is getting the better of me, just like it did last time. And just like last time, she looks like she wants to slap me.
“Go ahead,” I dare her. “Hit me.”
Her fists clench.
“Hit me and say you hate me. Then go be with your Leander.”
Her shoulders rise and fall. “He’s not my Leander.”
“He could be,” I tell her. “You want him to be, don’t you?”
“I married you,” Aster points out.
I laugh. “Oh, so now, all of a sudden, you’re saying our marriage is real?” I shake my head. “We both know why you married me, Aster. You’ve told me over and over.”
“But – ”
“You don’t love me.” I look into her eyes. “And I’m done loving you.”
I take the gold band off my finger and throw it on the grass. Aster’s jaw drops. Her hand goes to her chest. She looks like she’s about to cry.
“Oh, don’t cry,” I tell her. “I’m going to give you the divorce you asked for. You should be happy. You’re finally going to get what you want.”