“No, I don’t think I will understand, but you’re clearly still upset about earlier. So we’ll talk about this later.”
I turn to go, and for the first time she raises her voice. “Don’t you walk away from me.”
“Why not? You’ve already dropped the ultimatum bomb, there’s not much else you can fucking do to me.” I’m losing that calm and starting to crack. This is the absolute worst that it could have gone, and I don’t have much hope that anything is going to change her mind, because once my mom decides something, it’s pretty solid.
“I’m going to need your answer.”
I go stock still, and turn to face her. Staring her down. “No. You remember what you always used to say when you were negotiating a case and you offered a deal that the other side couldn’t refuse? You’d come home and tell me that you made them think about it. ‘Never let them give an answer in the heat of the moment, Julia. Always let them simmer in it for at least twelve hours so that they know that they’re goddamn beaten.’ So the least you can do is give me the same courtesy that you gave your opponents. Let me sit with it for twelve hours so that I know that I’m goddamn beaten.”
I don’t look back as I head up the stairs, and I consider myself lucky that I make it all the way into my bedroom before I start to cry.
19
Edward
I should have gone with her. That’s all I can think about right now. I should have gone with her. Not that Julia can’t handle herself, but I want to be with her. I want to protect her from hurt, and this whole situation is one giant ticking time bomb. I’m keeping myself from looking out the window to see if I can see movement, because they deserve their privacy. But not knowing is driving me insane.
The door slamming is the only warning that I get that Kevin is home. Good. I’ve been waiting. He insisted on helping me bring in the food, and he promised he would be discreet and leave immediately. But that didn’t happen. “Where have you been?”
“I had to get out of here to clear my head of the bullshit.”
“The bullshit? The bullshit that you started?”
Kevin rolls his eyes and shoulders past me. “I didn’t start anything.”
“You know that’s not true. You swore that you wouldn’t let her see you, and I’m the idiot that believed you. I should have just made two trips from the car.”
He ducks into the fridge and pulls out a beer. “You need to chill, Edward. That’s always your problem. You’ve always been too uptight. And you were there. You saw the way that bitch jumped on me and I didn’t even say anything. Acting like I don’t have the right to be there when she invited you.”
I grab the beer out of his hand and slam it down on the counter. The last thing I want Kevin to be doing right now is drinking. “If you don’t understand the difference there, then you’re dumber than I thought you were.”
“Putting your own brother down. Classic Edward. You think you’re better than me because Dad gave you the company.”
I sigh. “No, Kevin, I think I’m better than you because I own up to my mistakes and take responsibility for them. I don’t try to hurt people. Did you go over there when I went out with Julia a few days ago?”
“I don’t see why that’s any of your business.”
So he did go over there. Fuck. “Jane drank so much after you went over there that she blacked out. And that’s because of you. You didn’t have to do that. I know for a fact that she asked you never to talk to her again.”
“And I know for a fact that none of this is your business.”
“You’re in my house. What you do here, and did here, is my business.”
Deliberately, Kevin grabs the beer again, and opens it. He downs the entire thing in front of me before pitching it in the trash. “You’re such a prick, Edward. You’ve always had everything because Mom and Dad gave you whatever the hell you wanted. Precious little Edward. Handed everything in the world because you’re the youngest.”
It’s not worth arguing him on this point. The work I’ve done to get to where I am doesn’t matter to him. He’ll always see me as the usurper in his life because I have everything that he wants but doesn’t want to do the work for. I’m not going to get dragged into defending myself for something I haven’t done wrong, because there’s no winning that fight and it’s not the one we’re having right now. This is about him and what he’s doing.
“Why do you even care?” he asks. “Jane is nothing to you. Just a next door neighbor who hated men.” He grins. “Until she discovered my cock.”