I pause. Are we?
“None of your business,” I tell Owen.
“So you are fighting.”
I feel like punching him just to get that grin off his face.
“We are not. She hasn’t been feeling well. That’s all. You know how it is when they hit a rough phase.”
“Poor thing.” Owen clicks his tongue sympathetically. “Are you sure she’s not feeling well, though?”
I glance at him. “What?”
“You know, sometimes they fake it,” Owen says. “They just say they’re not feeling well so you’ll leave them alone. And you know what that means? It means the excitement has worn off. It means they don’t want you anymore. It means they’re craving something else, maybe even someone else.”
My stomach clenches. That can’t be what’s happening, right? Or can it?
Owen pats my shoulder. “My advice? Don’t let her ignore you. Remember that you’re the boss. Whatever is going on with her, you have a right to know. And if you think she’s getting tired of you? Well, it’s up to you to change her mind and remind her who she belongs to.”
I gulp down my drink. I know what Owen means by that last bit. I’ve tried that and I won’t do it again. I do think the first part of what he said makes sense, though.
Whatever is going on with Leah, I have a right to know.
So go home and find out.
~
I find Leah in her bed, reading a book. The moment I open the door, she turns off the light and hides beneath the covers.
I frown. That alone confirms the fact that she’s avoiding me, that she’s hiding something from me.
This time, though, I’m not letting it go. I’m not leaving her alone until I find out what’s going on with her.
I decide to take the calm approach first.
“Leah, tell me what’s going on.”
“Nothing,” she mumbles from under the quilt.
“I don’t believe you.” I sit on the edge of her bed. “I know you haven’t been yourself lately. I’m trying to understand why.”
“I’m fine,” she says.
I grit my teeth. She’s being stubborn, is she? Well, so am I.
“No, you’re not, and I’m not leaving until you tell me why.”
Leah doesn’t answer.
So now she’s giving me the silent treatment?
“You know you’re acting like a spoiled, selfish brat, right?”
Leah tosses the covers aside and glares at me. “I’m being selfish?”
Well, at least she’s talking.
“Yes,” I answer.
“I’m being selfish?” She scoffs and shakes her head. “You have no idea what I’m going through.”
“That’s why I’m asking you to tell me,” I tell her. “Tell me what’s going on with you so I can help you.”
“You can’t help me.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Why?” Leah shouts. “Because you think you’re so great? Because you think you can solve any problem?”
I narrow my eyes at her. “Why are you getting mad at me?”
“Because you’re…” She grips her hair. “You’re so frustrating. You think everything is so simple, but it’s not.”
I point a finger at my chest. “I’m frustrating?”
Leah doesn’t answer.
I point the finger at her as I get on my feet. “You’re the one who’s been acting strange. You’re the one who’s not telling me anything.”
“Why can’t you just leave me alone?” Leah buries her face in her hands. “Why do you have to make everything so hard?”
“I’m making everything hard?”
“Yes!” she shouts to my surprise.
I give her a puzzled look. “I don’t understand.”
Haven’t I done everything to make her life easy?
“Exactly,” Leah tells me with tears in her eyes. “You don’t understand that by trying to make things better, you’re just making them worse. You don’t understand that by trying to help me, you’re only hurting me. You’re only making things harder.”
“Then make me understand,” I raise my voice in exasperation.
Leah shakes her head.
“Leah…”
“Why can’t you understand that I’m doing this for you?” she says softly.
My eyebrows crease. “What?”
What is she doing for me, exactly?
“Just leave me alone, Gavin.”
She hides under the covers once more.
I shake my head. No, not after what she just said, not until I understand what’s happening here.
I pull the quilt off her. “Leah.”
“You just don’t get it, do you?” Her voice cracks as she snaps at me. “You just have to get what you want. You don’t care what I want. Who’s being selfish now?”
My jaw clenches. “I’m trying to understand you here.”
“And I’m telling you that you won’t understand!” Leah shouts. “How am I supposed to stay sane when you’re driving me crazy?”
That last remark causes a lump to form in my throat.
Leah shakes her head. “Gavin, I didn’t mean…”
“Yes, you did,” I cut her off.
She meant that I drove Nadine crazy and now I’m driving her crazy. It’s what she’s been trying to tell me all along.
And damn, it stings.
I thought she understood me. I thought she said that what happened to Nadine wasn’t my fault. I thought she said I didn’t have to worry about it happening again.