Lady Bits

I grind my molars together and force out my next words. “You could have called me, or stopped by my place.”

“I didn’t have your phone number, and I’ve been busy.”

The pressure that was slowly building in my head turns into a full-blown headache.

“You duped me,” I accuse. “The rumor years ago was you were going to school to become a cardiologist.”

This time he laughs. “First, I did not dupe you. I didn’t even know you were a patient of Dr. Rosen’s until about thirty minutes ago. And second, I had a change of plans in college.”

I want to call him a liar, but something tells me he’s telling the truth. I cross my arms over my chest and glare at him, not giving one shit I probably look like a petulant child.

“From the way you’re killing me with your eyes right now, I’m sure you’ll be relieved to know we have to reschedule your appointment anyway. The receptionist has already left for the day and Amanda had to suddenly leave for an emergency.” He pauses a moment and his gaze bores into me. “Unless you would still like me to perform the pelvic exam. The decision is yours.”

I take a minute to weigh my options. My first instinct is to request to reschedule or find a new doctor all together. The idea of Carter, or rather, Dr. Beckett, between my legs solely for clinical purposes does not sound appealing in the least. I also have to add in the possibility of being turned on while he’s down there, and how mortifying would that be.

As easy as it would be to find another doctor in a nearby town, that’s something I really don’t want to do. I like the ease and convenience of seeing a local doctor. I’m very much a creature comfort type of girl, and Silver Falls is that for me. I’d be quite satisfied to never leave Silver Falls if I didn’t have to.

There are a couple other doctors in town I could go to, but I’ve come to this office since the day I was born. Again, creature comfort.

With the gown covering my thighs balled into my fists, I straighten my spine and meet Carter’s eyes. “Let’s just get it over with. We’re both adults, and I assume you’ll be professional. I’d rather get it done so I don’t have to worry about it for another year.”

Surprise flickers in his eyes for a moment before it’s gone and his expression turns serious. “You’re sure?”

I’m about a hundred percent the opposite of sure, but I still nod. “Yes.”

“All right, let’s get to it then.”

He brings the laptop that Amanda left in the room to life and takes a seat on a stool, wheeling it closer to the counter. The next few minutes are spent with him asking me the usual questions. It almost feels like a normal appointment, except for the fact that I can’t stop staring at his arms and the way he fills out the white doctor’s coat he’s wearing. I know exactly how firm his arms are. How strong and capable they are at holding me up while he pounds into me against the shower wall.

Each time he looks up from the laptop and catches me staring, I jerk my eyes away. It’s ridiculous. I feel like a schoolgirl with her first crush.

“Are you sexually active?” he asks, and I snap my gaze back to him.

“Really?” I give him a deadpan look. “I’m pretty sure you know the answer to that.”

His chuckle is deep and makes my insides quiver. Maybe it was a mistake to continue on with this appointment. The last thing I want to happen is for Carter to realize I’m turned on, and he’ll damn sure know once I’m spread eagle in front of him.

“Sorry, it’s a standard question all women are asked for these types of visits.” He doesn’t look sorry. In fact, he looks highly amused at my expense. “Let me rephrase. Other than… our night together, when was your last sexual partner?”

“Is that something you really need to know?” I ask.

“Yes.”

The way he says that one word and the sudden tension in his shoulders has me wondering if my answer means more to him than just the standard level of medical interest.

I shift on the table, feeling a twinge of embarrassment, and the paper I’m sitting on crinkles.

“Before… you, it’s been about two and a half years,” I mumble.

Carter quickly looks back down at the laptop, but I don’t miss the relief that relaxes the features on his face.

A few more questions are asked and answered before he’s getting up from the rolling stool and walking to the sink to wash his hands. As he does this, he says over his shoulder, “I’m sure I don’t need to remind you of how this works. Go ahead and lie back.”

His tone suggests he’s in professional doctor mode, which only helps to alleviate my stress levels a fraction. I’m still Nervous Nelly as I lie back on the bed and wait for him. Breast exam comes first, then the pelvic exam.

I stare up at the ceiling and send up a silent prayer that I don’t embarrass myself even more than I already have. It feels like a lifetime passes before he comes into view. His expression is neutral, while my nerves are shot to shit.

Why in the hell did I agree to this? I should have just canceled this appointment and found another doctor.