CHAPTERTWO
Ben
I stand at the rear of the garden, holding a beer I’ve hardly sipped.
Parties have never been much fun for me. It’s not just that I’m a grumpy bastard, as Alex likes to joke. Or maybe it’s that combined with something else….
Maybe it’s because I always feel like I need to be moving, doing something, and being productive somehow.
Maybe it has something to do with the darkness in me, or whatever the hell it is, this thing inside of me that makes it so I can’t think too long, too deeply.
I have to do, act, fight, or work or something.
But parties are the opposite of that. They’re about relaxing, talking, and letting go of the tension.
“Are you trying to scare the guests, bro?” Alex grins, swaggering over.
I smirk at my oldest friend. He’s around six feet, his shoulders wide, his stance that of a boxer’s. It’s probably the same way I stand, our posture making it clear we can handle ourselves if we need to.
He runs a hand through his sandy hair, his color holding on for longer than mine did.
“Because you look like you’re trying to scare the guests.”
I chuckle gruffly. The garden has split off into small social circles, with people mingling and laughing.
“All I can think about is the report for the new gym,” I tell him.
Alex frowns. For a moment, I think he’s going to get serious. My mind starts frantically searching for escape strategies for a way to avoid a heart-to-heart or any emotional stuff.
But then he grins as if deciding he doesn’t want to ruin the party’s spirit.
“The new gym application is doing just fine,” he says. “Plus, it’s Friday evening. Even if you submitted the report now, they wouldn’t be able to read it until Monday.”
“I know,” I sigh darkly. “I just hate doing nothing. That’s all.”
Alex knows my history, what happened with my Mom, and my childhood. But he doesn’t bring it up often, and I’m glad when he chooses the same now. He’s not going to turn this party into a therapy session.
“Do something then,” Alex says. “Mingle. Who knows, you might even find a special somebody of your own.”
“Yeah, maybe.”
I keep my expression neutral, not letting Alex see the effect his words have on me.
Find a special somebody….
But no woman has ever ignited anything in me. No woman has ever made me care, has ever made me want to claim her or to possess her. I’ve stopped trying. I’ve stopped caring.
Work, growing our business, doing as much as we can for charity…that’s what matters.
“Alex,” Tiffany calls across the garden. “Can I speak with you for a second?”
Alex smiles at his fiancée’s voice, the love clear in the way his eyes light up. Ever since they met, Alex has been crazy about her. It’s the sort of obsession I thought I might feel once upon a time.
It’s the sort of obsession I’ve given up ever experiencing.
“Duty calls,” Alex says. “See you soon.”
I nod, taking a small sip of my beer. I’m not much of a drinker, and this will probably be my only one, but it makes me feel less awkward standing here with a drink.