I reached out to him, scrunching his white tee and pulling him to me. I craned my head up to meet his brown gaze. “Are you scared I’m unimpressed or something?”
He didn’t answer, but his lips pressed down tight, confirming my answer.
I let out a soft laugh. “Is this not head and shoulders above the trailer park we grew up in, Hunt?”
Now he finally met my eye, his expression still uncertain. “This isn’t a sprawling penthouse, either—”
“No, it’s not,” I sharply confirmed, expression solemn now as I added, “But I’m no princess, Hunt, and this is perfect.”
He still didn’t appear convinced. “The right thing would have been to find a place, even an average one, until I got my shit sorted—”
“It’s not your duty to put a pretty roof over my head,” I interrupted, giving him a tired look now. “Come on, Hunt, stop it already. I’m happy wherever I am, so long as it’s withyou.”
He searched my eyes. “You mean that?”
I nodded. “Of course I do—”
“I want you,” he declared suddenly. “I want you more than I want to breathe. I have been counting down every minute of every day for this, Skye.”
I smiled, heart jumping at the piercing look he gave me. “Like I said before.I’m yours, Hunt.”
His chest sank from my words. He took my hand and squeezed it, his voice aching as he spoke, “I’ve spent many years wondering what it would feel like to hear you say that to me.” He brought my hand up and kissed it, and then he kept it to his mouth, shutting his eyes. “I know…I know this arrangement doesn’t solve everything in the long run. That, one day, it might not be enough for you to have us in this way, but…I won’t take a single second of it for granted. Should you ever decide not to meet me in front of Leo’s apartment building with a suitcase in hand, I want you to know that I’d understand.”
Hunter was having a low moment. He talked like I might flee at any second. Like he wasn’t good enough for me—which was ludicrous because I wasn’t anything special. My boys had deluded themselves into thinking I was worthy of their sole love. Like I was some ethereal angel worth fighting for.
I was just me.
For a single moment, I felt the most horrible feeling of guilt. I was responsible for their grief and uncertainty.
I wished I could make it stop.
I licked my lips, pondering my words before admitting, “Sometimes I wish you both would let me go. Because maybe you’d find someone you love and want to spend the rest of your life with. And she’d be yours all the time.”
I shook my hand from Hunter’s hold and stepped back to cross my arms together, shielding myself from my own emotions. “I wouldn’t care if I hurt for the rest of my life if it meant you both were happy.”
“That won’t happen,” Hunter replied with conviction. “You’ve ruined us—”
“I never wanted to ruin anyone.”
“Tough luck, Skye. It happened long before you could have stopped it.” He closed the distance again, watching me intently. “We are powerless now, and you hold all the control. Leo says that should you walk from one of us, or both, we would let you go, but…” He paused, his gaze loaded with emotion when he rasped out, “I feel, in my bones, that you’remine. I feel…like in every reality that exists out there, we’ve found one another. You know what the beauty is in that, Skye?” He smiled; eyes loaded with hope. “It means I got to have you time and time again. It means we’ve found each other, and we’ll keep finding each other, no matter how this goes. In the infinite abyss, we are One.”
I was speechless.
I stood before him, completely astounded by his words. Hunter had never spoken so eloquently to me before. Buried under his violent layers and brooding nature was an emotional man that viewed the world with hope and beauty.
I had no way of reciprocating my affections to him out loud. I buried my face into his chest instead and wrapped my arms around him, holding him tightly to me. I felt his speeding heart in my ear, and I wanted so desperately to bring him closer, to allow him to touch my soul just so he could know what I felt for him.
“I love you,” I stated simply.
He ran his nose along my hair, murmuring, “I know, Skye. I know.”
If he knew, why did he sound so sad?
*
One of the tallboys was empty, and it smelled brand new, so I knew he’d bought it just for me. He helped me unpack my clothes and place them neatly in the drawers. He spent a little too long sorting out my underwear pile. I smacked him on the shoulder when he spread a tattered one wide and said, “I expected while living in luxury you would have at least bought some new thongs—”
Smack. Smack. Smack.