ELLA
While emotional attachments between clients and members of The Firm are expected, these attachments will be carefully managed so they do not compromise the safety of the client or any member of The Firm.
All I keep thinking about is how well it went. I hadn’t realized how much I missed them. I missed going out, I missed laughing, I missed seeing the people I love.
There’s still a pounding anxiousness in my chest that won’t quit. It’s been there since this morning and it hasn’t left me for a moment, other than one.
When Zander cupped my chin, when he let me deepen the kiss, when he pulled me in close to him and there wasn’t a thing separating us.
It all stopped then, and that anxious feeling in my chest … it changed. It’s still there thrumming away as I wait for him at the bottom of the stairs.
Picking at my nails, I wonder if he feels it too. I can’t help but to worry. He’s been different, quiet. Or at least I think he has. Maybe it’s all in my head.
A huff of nervous laughter leaves me at the thought.
Damon took me home after lunch so it’s been hours now since I’ve seen Zander, but he should be here any moment. I imagine he’ll be wearing what he did earlier, but I’ve changed. There’s a chill that slips up the silk fabric of my pale pink robe as I sit here and without anything under it, shivers grace my bare skin.
I remember this part. I remember falling. To be in this moment and know it is surreal. That fluttering of butterflies dives lower as the rumble of my name reaches me. His timbre is low, seductive.
“There you are,” he murmurs and I peer up at him, sitting on the bottom step and feeling so small beneath him.
He towers over me and I’m so very aware of how much power I’ve given him. How much control he has over my emotions, my actions … my desires.
“And there you are,” I offer him in return, attempting to maintain a semblance of confidence that seems blurred in all of this.
“I did good today … didn’t I?” I question and if I wasn’t his submissive, I’d hate that I’m searching for his approval. If I’m honest, part of me isn’t at this moment. Part of me sees a man I’m falling for, and I want him to be proud of me.
“You did exceptionally well.”
“I told you you’d like them.” Nervous jitters leave me as I reach for the journal. “You’ll want to read the part I’ve bookmarked with the ribbon,” I tell him and swallow the knot in my throat. “I did what you asked. I wrote what it was that I thought would please you most.”
My heart pounds as Zander takes the journal from me, his fingers slipping against mine as he does and there’s an electric knowing that forces me to pull my hand away faster than I’d like.
His stubbled jaw is strong at this angle, his gaze holding something I haven’t seen before. Thump, thump, my heart wars inside of me.
“You wrote what would please me most?” he asks and I nearly spill it all right now as I stare up at him, praying he’ll understand. That what I feel for him is what he feels for me and that even my darkest days won’t take away from what we have.
Tears prick at the memory, the memories, the anguish, the shame still fresh in my mind. “I did it. And you said … you promised that I could pick what would please me most if I did it,” I remind him. The desperation in my voice doesn’t go unnoticed by either of us.
Letting the hand holding the notebook fall to his side, Zander asks me, “And what is it that you want most? What would please you most?”
Standing on shaky legs, my fingers fumble with the tie of the robe, but only for a half second before it comes undone. The moment it opens, I shrug it off my shoulders and let the diaphanous fabric fall to the floor, leaving me bared to him.
His gaze drops to my breasts and he utters my name in weakness, “Ella.”
“Take me,” I plead. “Take me upstairs and make me yours. Please.” My fantasy, what I want most … it’s for me to have him, fully and in every way. Not just for tonight, but we can start with this moment.
Staring into his eyes, I pray he can feel how much I need this, especially after today and whatever’s changed between us. “I want you,” I whisper.
His lips crash against mine and I moan into his mouth. Loving him, needing him. This. All of this. It’s everything that I have been missing.
He takes the stairs two at a time. One arm bracing my bare back, his hand gripping my neck to hold me to him, his other arm wrapped around my ass as tightly as my legs are wrapped around his thighs. I’m barely aware of the world around us, it whips by far too quickly.
The second my back hits the door, there’s a click of the knob being twisted and it opens behind me. Ushering an approving groan from Zander.
I’m on the bed at once, letting out a gasp. Zander’s quick to undress himself as I push myself back on the bed.
And then there he is, a hunter at the end of my bed. Crawling toward me, naked, and his cock jutting out, hard and thick. The heat from his body is nearly suffocating. He is everything, and nothing else matters as licks his lower lip and takes a languid lick of my pussy. He doesn’t hesitate to dip his tongue into my entrance, causing my back to arch. His large hands wrap around my inner thighs, spreading me and holding me there for him as he moves his lips to my clit and sucks.