With my teeth clenched, I force out profanity as he fucks me, his fingers curled so every stroke hits the wall where that bundle of sensitive nerves lies. He’s relentless, near brutal as goosebumps spread along my skin.
It’s beyond impossible to stay still. My legs tremble and before I can get out an apology or an excuse, Zander keeps me trapped in his gaze as he plants a kiss on my quivering thigh.
It takes everything I have to remain motionless and obey. My body begs to buck as the pleasure builds. It carries me higher and higher and I whisper, as if the single letter is a plea, “Z.”
Adding in a third, he finger fucks me harder and without any mercy.
“Fuck!” I cry out, my body instinctively attempting to escape the threat of my impending climax.
It hits me just as Zander squeezes my breast. He’s not gentle and the hint of pain only adds to the overwhelming pleasure. A cold sweat covers my body as the waves run through me.
My inhale is staggered as I attempt to retake my place and then I’m paralyzed by his next action.
He works his fourth finger in me, stretching me with a sweet, stinging pain. The pleasure lingers and feels especially present between my legs where it’s far more tender.
“Good girl, taking what I give you.” His groan of approval brings more heat. “I want to give you more.”
“More?” I can barely breathe at hearing the word, already overwhelmed and stretched and full.
“Be a good girl, Ella. I want to see how much you can take.” He plants a small kiss just beneath my belly button.
His fist? “Are you—fuck!” My neck arches as I scream out, loving the mix of pleasure and pain and feeling this … taken.
He doesn’t look me in the eye. Instead he leans down, his broad shoulders forcing my legs farther apart. He takes my clit into his mouth, sucking harder than he did before and my head drops as the sounds of him working his hand promise me that the reality is exactly what I think it is. His fingers bend, his knuckles brutally pushing against my walls, his pace never lessening.
It’s all too much. I’m too hot, the pleasure building again, far more this time, taking me higher, to a place where I know the fall will destroy me after it’s taken me.
My throat feels raw, the safe word hovering, threatening to be spoken. I feel full, tight, ready to split. A shiver rides up my shoulders just as I feel him press the tip of his thumb in and I can’t take it.
I can’t take any more. I’m so close once again. Too close. Too full.
“It’s too much,” I try to speak, but the words are incoherent. “Pink. Pink,” I say and struggle, my head pressed firmly to the pillow, my body still shaking. All at once, I’m empty and cold.
“I’ve got you.” Zander’s voice is steadying as I roll onto my side. My legs collapse together and the blanket is pulled around my shoulders, the warmth nothing compared to what Z had just done to me. My shoulders shake with a shiver that’s only subdued when my Dominant lies behind me, his chest to my back, his arms around me, holding me tightly.
I didn’t even feel the tears that had leaked out of the corner of my eyes and rolled down my cheeks until my heart stopped hammering.
“I’ve got you,” he whispers, his lips at the shell of my ear. He shushes me, he tells me it’s all right.
I’m barely cognizant of what just happened. When my breathing calms, I realize I safe worded. “I didn’t mean to.”
My denial is met with a kiss on the curve of my neck. Not too short, an openmouthed version that lingers. “You did,” he says. With his lips in my hair, he kisses me again. His arm tightens, pulling me to him as he tells me it’s all right.
I recall only safe wording once with James. Only when he cracked the whip and it broke my skin. Only once because of the sudden pain and fear. I was terrified. That was an entirely different experience. He apologized. He held me, but I was crying. The pain lasted and I shoved him away. It was awful.
This … this doesn’t feel like that at all. Not in the least.
“You’re crying.” Zander’s voice is full of concern. I wish I could say anything, but I can’t utter a word.
“Where do you hurt?”
I can’t answer his question because it’s not like he could do a damn thing to fix it. Damon said I may be displacing my feelings and I think he might be right. I still love James. I love him and I think I love Zander too, but I don’t know how that’s possible.
“It’s okay, you can cry.” I know he’s looking down at me but I keep my eyes shut tight. “If you want me to stop—”
“Don’t stop.” I beg him with quickly ushered words. “Don’t stop. Please, Z, hold me.”