Whispered Promises

Lea shrugged. “Mary and I may have a past that hasn’t always been pretty, but she’s the real deal, snarky attitude and all.”

Brie nodded in agreement.

When the doorbell rang, Lea insisted on answering the door herself. Brie’s jaw dropped the second Mary walked into the apartment. She had cut off her long blonde hair and now wore a short bob.

Mary narrowed her eyes. “What the hell are you two gawking at?”

Lea shrugged. “Just taking in the new you.”

Mary rolled her eyes. “I’m the same fucking bitch, so you two cunts can look the other way.”

Brie thought the hairstyle was flattering on Mary’s face and told her, “It complements you.”

“Like I give a damn,” Mary snorted in disgust. “I just needed a change.”

Lea’s eyes flashed with excitement, seeing an opportunity for a joke. “What did one curly hair say to the other curly hair when they asked for a dance?”

Mary shook her finger at Lea. “Don’t you even—”

When Lea opened her mouth, Mary immediately stopped her. “Zip it, big boobs. I’m warning you.”

“But—”

“I’m serious,” she snarled.

“You haven’t even heard the—”

Mary glanced at the door. “You want me to leave right now?”

Lea pouted her bottom lip and looked at Brie helplessly.

Brie gave Lea a sympathetic smile and shrugged, knowing Mary wouldn’t budge. “You heard the lady.”

Poor Lea looked like she was ready to burst from having to hold in the punchline. Somehow, though, she managed and squeaked, “Anyone want something to drink?”

“I’ll have the usual,” Mary replied, sitting down.

Lea turned to Brie and asked in the same high-pitched voice, “And you, Stinky Cheese?”

“I’ll have whatever you’re having.”

Lea closed her eyes in pain, muttering, “I have the perfect joke for that…”

“But you’re going to keep it to yourself so we can actually enjoy ourselves for a change,” Mary insisted.

Lea sighed and turned without further protest, heading to her kitchenette.

Brie glanced at Mary. “She just wants to make you laugh.”

Mary shook her head. “If I give Lea an inch, she’ll take a mile. She never stops yapping. She’s like a little Chihuahua.” Holding up her hand, she moved it like a hand puppet. “Yap, yap, yap…”

Lea walked back with their drinks, biting her lip to keep from talking.

Mary took the drink and held it up. “Thank God for Captain. He’s the only man I’ll let fuck me these days.”

Brie and Lea both looked at each other, taken aback.

Mary raised an eyebrow. “Get your minds out of the gutter, bitches. I’m talking about Captain Morgan.” With that, Mary downed the drink in no time flat. “Hit me with another.”