Reaper's Awakening

He gave me a narrow-eyed glare, but I wasn’t going to be the one to point out that he’d made a dog bed. He would only leave in a huff if I said anything.

When we turned off the lights and silence settled over us, all my questions bubbled up to the surface. How I had this much energy still, I would never know. My arcana still struggled to break free of my control. It wanted to stretch out and explore the city to its content.

I wondered if this energy came from the rosary still around my neck, but it seemed to come from within me. There was so much more of it than I ever realized. Looking back, I understood why I lost control of it so often. How could I hold all of this back? It kept pouring forth, seemingly endless.

“You need to sleep,” Maddox grumbled in the dark.

“How do you know I’m not sleeping?”

“Well, for starters, you answered me. Other than that, I can hear your breathing. It’s not even. Go to sleep, Addie.” He moved, perhaps rolling onto his back.

I could feel his glare, even through the dark. It made me smile. I wasn’t sure why I wanted to be so contrary, but the urge to put up a fight came over me, and I didn’t do a damn thing to stop it.

“You first,” I said with a smile.

He groaned. “That’s not how this works. If I fall asleep, and you get up and wander off, then I won’t be able to keep you safe.”

“So what? So, what if I wander off and get caught? That’s not your fault. Let me get my just desserts. The world would be a little safer without me, at least.”

Maddox leapt up off the floor. His body pinned mine to the bed before I could even react. My heart did excited flips inside my chest again. Breath caught in my throat, all I could do was stare into his eyes, pale with the light of his beast.

He ran a hot hand up my chest and over my throat so he could grip my jaw. “Don’t. You. Dare. Say. That.”

My breath trembled out of me. Adrenaline rushed through my veins. I arched into him without thinking.

Maddox growled in response. He removed his hand only to bury his face in the crook of my neck. “You’re not allowed to leave.”

This wasn’t just a bid for safety. There was more to Maddox’s words. I didn’t dare unpack what that meant right now. When his beast was close to taking over, I would have to be careful.

I cupped his cheek. Without thinking, I ran my hand up to thread my fingers through his hair. He moaned and leaned into my touch. Already, I could feel him growing hard against me. I had to fight to keep from rolling my eyes back in my head.

Need hit me like that bus almost had the other day. I wanted Maddox more than anything I’d ever wanted before.

But my arcana had to go and ruin it. The power nudged at him and tried to slip through him. He snarled and leapt away from me. I found myself cold without his body against mine. A pout reached my lips before I could think to shove it away.

“Quit that.” His voice was more beast than man.

I buried my face in my hands. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t do it on purpose. I swear I didn’t do it on purpose!”

Even though I couldn’t see him, I could hear his heaving breaths. I’d pushed him too far, and now his beast was terrified. Though he’d eaten earlier, there was still a chance that he would lose control. His beast didn’t want to be my plaything. I didn’t want to make him one, either!

When would I stop screwing up? When would I be able to keep this arcana inside me where it belonged?

“This mongrel wants it,” Maddox growled, finally. “This damn dog wants you to leash it. Nothing would make the damn beast happier than if you forced me to heel to your command.”

I froze.

Wait.

It was the other way around? His beast wanted this? Maddox was the one who ran scared? That changed things, but only barely. That meant that I didn’t have to fear the beast going off on an angry rampage. Should Maddox lose the fight with his wolf, it would come to me, and we could wait it out.

However, Maddox refused to trust the beast. He didn’t want his beast to submit so easily. I didn’t want that, either. He wasn’t my plaything. I’d never meant to bind him to me like that.

“When…when Alvin bit you, I was in the process of trying to take control of him. Do you think that did something to you when you were changed?” I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them.

Maddox’s back hit the wall. He slid down it until he was seated on the floor. The light of his beast still lingered in his eyes. I wanted to console him, but there was no way for me to do that when I was the problem.

It seemed like neither of us would get any sleep tonight. I glanced at the clock on my nightstand. It was nearly four in the morning. The sun would crest the horizon in a couple of hours. We could sleep the day away, but the light would make that difficult.