Shatter (Seaside 3)

“Oh, honey…” Angelica stopped putting sand in her bucket and turned a wicked smile toward Nat. “You sweet, innocent little lamb. You know absolutely nothing. Isn’t that right, Alec?”

Forgetting about the cameras for a brief second, I wondered if I would actually get arrested for striking a woman. I clenched sand hard in my fist until I was sure I would have bruises of tiny sand marks etched on my skin.

“Five more minutes!” Ruben announced. “And the castles have to be finished before you row back to the next shore and move on toward your last game of the day!”

“Ignore her,” I whispered to Nat as I released all the sand from my hand and wiped it across my board shorts.

“Can we be done?” she asked in a small voice.

I inspected our castle. It was damn near perfect. “Yup!”

Hand in hand we ran back to our boat and began rowing back to the original shore.

Nat was silent until about halfway across. “What did Angelica mean? Does she know something I don’t?”

Hell, yes. “Don’t worry about it. She’s just jealous because I’m the only Daniels brother she hasn’t slept with.”

Nat’s eyes closed. “I didn’t realize how badly I needed to hear you say that until now.”

“Say what? That she’s jealous?”

“No.” Nat shook her head. “That you haven’t slept with her. I was worried that… well, I mean, it would explain a lot.”

I almost laughed. She was relieved I didn’t sleep with Angelica, yet she had no idea what I did do that night. No idea the choices I made and how they would affect her even now as she was stressing about another woman.

“I didn’t sleep with her. If I remember correctly I rejected her.” I cleared my throat and looked down at my feet as I continued to row. “I may have kissed her.”

“WHAT?” Nat roared.

I ducked. Self-preservation and all that. Besides who really wants to sport two black eyes, both from your girlfriend?

“When?”

“Before you and I were dating,” I answered honestly. Finally. I could at least tell the truth about that. “I, uh, well, we had to do some promo together. We both had a lot to drink and I kissed her. Actually, she kissed me and then I pushed her away, but still.”

“Gross.” Nat shivered. “No offense, but you’re an idiot.”

I gulped and tried to laugh with her but it sounded too hollow. Oh, I was an idiot all right. I was a damn fool. But instead of pushing me to confession, all it did was make me want to control the situation more. I pushed the truth so far back into my head that I wasn’t even sure what reality was anymore.

But one thing was certain.

I couldn’t keep hurting her every damn day and not want to die a thousand deaths because of it.

I was going to choose me.

Which meant, in the end, I was choosing us. But that also meant I was screwing my brother. Just like before. Only this time I knew forgiveness wouldn’t be so freely offered. And if it was it would be right before he pushed me off a very tall cliff.

Chapter Fifteen

Alec

Five days later and we were still in what Demetri referred to as Hell Week, a.k.a. Teambuilding Week.

How was it teambuilding if we did nothing but fight?

Wonder of all wonders, my black eye made the five o’clock news, as well as my little toss with Nat in the sand, which had me looking like a player. Great. That’s just what I needed before Angelica went to the press.

I knew what I needed to do. I just didn’t know how to go about it without hurting people.

If I lied, I hurt Nat. If I told the truth I hurt Demetri and Nat. If I denied everything then I was lying to myself — but the sick part was I still didn’t know everything that went down last year.

I shook my head and sighed, at least now it was Friday night, and we were having a barbeque. I was in charge of cooking, because last time Demetri let Bob, our security guard, cook something, he nearly burnt the house down.

Demetri and Alyssa were inside making salad while I tossed burgers. I was still irritated that I had to wear the stupid apron Nat had made for me.

It said, “Kiss me, I’m Alec Daniels.”

I looked down and sighed. That’s just what I needed. A kiss? Sex? Maybe a massage? Speaking of all of the above, where the hell had Nat gone?

The smell of roses floated through the air. Breathing became strained as I clenched the cool metal flipper in my hand. I knew that smell.

“What is that?” I asked stepping unsteadily into the hotel room.

“My own scent,” she announced proudly, lifting her wrist to my nose. “I’m signing a deal with a cosmetics company and we’re picking out perfumes.”

“It smells like roses.”

“But not old person roses right?” She winked. “I want people to buy it, not spray it on their grandmas.”

I snorted in disgust. “Please, you look nothing like a grandma.”

“You’re only fifteen years younger than me, Alec Daniels. How dare you even accuse me of such a thing?”

“Once a cougar, always a cougar.” I laughed and then tripped, falling onto her bed. Just how much had I had to drink?

“Champagne?” she asked.

“Sure.” I held out my hand as my vision suddenly blurred. “What the hell is wrong with me?”

“What?”

“Oh.” I shook my head. “I hadn’t meant to say that out loud.”