Heartless (Merciless 2)

With my eyes shut tightly and a sickness stirring in my stomach, I force my eyes open. I force myself to see everything.

Nikolai makes up one of the three. The other two are my cousins, Brett and Henry. They’re brothers and years older than me. We’ve shared every holiday. I was a bridesmaid in Brett’s wedding. Every event we’ve been to together for years flashes before my eyes as I see Brett spit blood onto the floor. The left side of his face is already bruised and the black chestplate of his armor is covered in blood.

My heart squeezes. I don’t want to see this. I can’t. I can’t watch, but I have to do something.

“We’re not telling you shit,” Brett sneers and Henry struggles next to him. With their wrists bound behind their backs, Henry sways. His right eye is swollen and that’s all I can see, but he’s not well.

What did they do to you? My heart bleeds at the question.

Jase and Declan have guns pointed at the back of their heads, with all three of them kneeling in a row in front of them.

“You want to join your friends sooner, rather than later?” Jase questions them.

I’ve never felt so betrayed. So sickened. Bile rises in my throat as my gaze drifts across the three men I’ve known all my life so close to their lives being over if only a trigger is pulled.

“Fuck you,” Nikolai grunts out, pulling my focus to him. Although he stares at Carter with nothing but hate, his eyes show his pain. And it’s my undoing.

The war has never felt so alive as it does now.

That’s when I see a light shine, directing my eyes to what matters.

Carter’s gun is tucked in the back of his pants. It’s staring right at me, the light from the room reflecting on it. And the guns on the floor behind him. Three guns and one I recognize as Nikolai’s.

He took their guns, he kicked them away from my family. And now they kneel in front of Jase and Declan, waiting for execution. The sound of a gun being cocked pushes me forward and leaves me no choice.

My hands shake as I crawl toward the guns. One scratches across the floor as I try to pick it up and I know at that point they see me. So, I do the only thing I can.

I point the gun at the enemy who doesn’t have a gun.

I stand on weak legs and grip the gun as tightly as I can. Aiming it at the back of Carter’s head. Knowing I’ve made a choice and hating myself for it but fueled by the need to protect my only friend and family.

“Carter,” I call out his name and feel the eyes of everyone else in the room on me as Carter turns slowly around to face me.

His eyes flash as he lets out a breath, but he doesn’t retreat, he doesn’t even seem to take me seriously. He looks at me the way you’d look at a child playing dress-up. Non-threatening and as if they’re simply being cute. It cuts me in a way I didn’t think was possible.

He really cares so little for me. He’s really going to kill them all and expects me to fall in line, obeying and submitting to his every whim.

As he steps toward me and I pull the trigger back even though my hands tremble, his expression morphs, and the damage I’ve done is so clear to me in this moment. His firm expression of disapproval and irritation changes to one I’ve never seen. A mask of hardness and sharpness that makes his chiseled features look even more dominating and villainous.

I can hear him breathe as he stops in his tracks. Everything about him is terrifying, save the look in his eyes. Those dark eyes with bright specks of silver still shine with something else. Hope, maybe? But it vanishes when I call out to him, feeling the tightness in my throat and chest squeezing the courage from me. “Let them go,” I force the words out and they come out strong. I don’t know how because at the moment I feel nothing but weak.

I feel like I failed the boy still hurting inside of Carter. I’ve lost the trust. I can see it as Carter’s eyes glaze over and the darkness overwhelms them. I’ve never hurt so much in my life as I do now, but what else was there for me to do? I’m in a hopeless situation and there’s no possible way for me to win.

My palms are so hot and tingling with the rush of adrenaline and mix of fear that controls my every move, and I nearly drop the gun but somehow, I hold it steady and keep it pointed on Carter.