Dangerous Notes (Dark Pen)

“We may have taken a small detour there for a few years, but I am so grateful we came through it all stronger than ever. I am not a perfect man, but I know you make me better. You are the only person in the world I want to go to sleep next to every night and wake up with each morning, and I would be honored if you would become my wife.”

Dex’s voice cracks with emotion on his final sentence and if he has more he wants to say, it’s lost when Katja launches herself out of her seat and into his arms, almost tipping them over onto the floor as she pelts him with kisses while answering with a litany of, “Yes, yes, yes.”

I’m overwhelmed with joy and as I glance to my right to see how Z feels watching the two people he’s grown up with getting engaged, I see him watching me instead of them. The smirk on his face tells me all I need to know.

I slap his chest playfully. “You knew he was going to propose, and you didn’t tell me!”

“Of course, I didn’t tell you,” Z defends.

“I can’t believe you,” I say, dabbing at the tears in my eyes with the corner of my cloth napkin. “You promised me we wouldn’t keep secrets from each other.”

“Sorry babe, but this doesn’t count. It wasn’t my secret to tell, and anyway, I would never expect you to betray a confidence Katja tells you.”

I hate he has a point and I’m just so happy for my friends, I let it go. Following Z’s lead, we both push to our feet and approach the newly engaged couple again, this time to give congratulatory hugs.

“You are going to make the most beautiful bride in history,” I tell Katja.

Dex agrees. “I can’t wait to see you walking down the aisle in my direction. I want to set a date as soon as possible,” he urges.

I’m the one who cautions him. “Big weddings take time to plan. You can’t rush things too much.”

“The hell I can’t. I don’t give a shit about anything except making you mine in every way,” he announces to his new fiancée.

It’s Katja who settles things. “I don’t want to wait a long time either, and lucky for us, we happen to own one of the absolutely most sought-after wedding venues in New York City. I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to book our event even on short notice.”

All four of us burst out laughing with pure joy, and I realize this is the absolutely best Christmas of my life.

As I watch Dex and Katja leaving to take their celebration behind closed doors, Z hugs me from behind, watching with me and only speaking when we are alone.

“I hope you aren’t disappointed I didn’t buy you a ring for Christmas this year as well.” I detect a vulnerability in his voice and wish I could see his eyes. I wiggle in his arms until he lets me spin so I am facing him.

Looking into his caramel brown eyes, I answer truthfully. “Of course not. Dex and Katja have known each other their entire lives. There is little they don’t know about each other. You on the other hand, still surprise me every day with new revelations about you, Mr. Blackstone.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” he admits. “I’m sort of waiting for you to discover something new you aren’t going to like.”

I see a flicker of fear I don’t like in his eyes. I’m determined to douse it. “Trust me when I say there is absolutely nothing about you, Z, I don’t already love. You are the most remarkable man I have ever met I’ve truly never been happier than these last few months with you. So…while it may be too soon for engagements, if you think you’re going to get away from me, you’d better put that out of your mind right now.”

The grin of his I love so much is back, lighting up his eyes. “So bossy. Exactly the way I love you.”

His words warm me, and I can’t resist reminding him, “I happen to like how bossy you are too—in our bedroom. Want to go upstairs?” I ask with hope in my voice.

“Oh baby, I thought you’d never ask.”

New Year’s Eve - The Whitehall in London

Z

No matter how old I get, I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to living in the limelight after having spent the first twenty-eight years of my life operating only in the shadows. If I’m honest with myself, I hadn’t been one hundred percent sure I’d enjoy living my life out in the open here in London, but looking around the ballroom—my ballroom—full of elegant people, sipping on the champagne I’d ordered and listening to the string quartet I’d booked, a sense of true satisfaction settles into my bones.