“Kynslee, please don’t cry.”
A sob slipped free. Miles was out of his truck, and within seconds he had me standing in front of him, holding me in his arms.
“Please don’t leave me, Miles. Please don’t do this.”
I was being selfish, and I didn’t care.
He drew back and wiped my tears from my cheeks. “I have to. I’m so sorry. You’re going to be fine. I know you will be. And I’ll be back. I swear to you, Kynslee.”
My lower lip quivered. I would have given anything in that moment for him to press his mouth to mine. To kiss me and tell me he was going to miss me, that he’d come back for me.
A pained expression moved over his face. “Don’t look at me like that.”
“Like what?” I whispered.
He shook his head. “Like you want me to kiss you.”
I placed my hand on his chest and felt his heart racing as fast as mine. “Miles.”
It was the only thing that would come out, barely above a whisper.
Leaning his forehead against mine, Miles took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “Let’s make a promise, right here and now. If neither of us is married by thirty, then we’ll marry each other.”
The corners of my mouth rose slightly. Miles and his promises. I took in a steady breath and said it. “You know I love you, right?”
He closed his eyes. “I know. I love you, too. Promise me, Kynslee. Right now. Make me this promise.”
I swallowed hard. “I promise you.”
“Swear it.”
Drawing my head back, our eyes met. “I swear to you that if I’m not married to anyone when I’m thirty, I’ll marry you.”
His blue eyes lit up, and he grinned. He saved that grin only for me, the one where his adorable dimples popped out in each cheek. Miles was handsome, there was no denying that. He was my handsome best friend whom all the girls in school wanted. And at that very moment, I wanted him, too. More than anything. More than I had any right to. I needed to memorize everything about him because who knew when I would see him again…or even if I would see him again. I couldn’t let my mind go to that dark place or I’d never let him out of my sight.
“You know I’m going to hold you to that,” he said.
With a roll of my eyes I looked away. “You’ll probably meet someone in the Marines and marry them before I even finish college, so I’m not really worried.”
“I highly doubt that.”
My eyes searched him. Miles had what my momma called boyish good looks. His baby face was trying to catch up with the rest of his body. After years of working on a farm, Miles had a nice body. Broad chest but not too big. Muscles that he earned from hard work, not pumping weights in a gym, although playing football since he was seven helped. He was perfect in every sense. Inside and out.
Yeah, some lucky girl will snatch him up in a heartbeat.
“When do you think you’ll be back?” I softly asked.
He kissed my forehead. “I don’t know. I’ll come back as soon as I can.”
I buried my face in his chest.
“Promise?”
He held me tighter. “I won’t make a promise I don’t intend on keeping, Kynslee.”
Drawing back, our eyes met. “Will you do me one thing before you leave tomorrow?”
“Anything.”
“Be with me tonight, Miles. Just one more time.”
His Adam’s apple bopped as he swallowed. “Kyns.”
Tears filled my eyes. “Do you not want me?”
He looked like I had slapped him. “Not want you? Are you kidding me?”
I gave a half shrug, confused by what was happening between us. He took my hand and led me down the path toward the barn. My heart raced as we climbed the steps to the loft. Memories of our first time together flooded my mind. My hands shook as he moved closer to me.
“Do you want me to make love to you, Kyns?”
His words rattled my insides, in both a good way and a bad. Had he whispered those words to another girl? How many? Did it mean anything to him? I pushed my thoughts aside and nodded. I smiled and answered him honestly. “More than anything. Help me remember you and remember us until you come back to me.”
And Miles did just that. No man would ever be able to replace him in my life, or in my heart, in my soul.
Never.
Kynslee – Present day
THE MOMENT I opened my eyes, I knew it was going to be a shit-filled day. Never mind the pounding headache from last night’s girls’ night out to celebrate my thirtieth birthday. I could deal with that. What I couldn’t deal with was my mother yelling at the geese outside my bedroom window at what felt like the butt-crack of dawn but what was actually late morning. It was my mom’s sad attempt at letting me know I had slept half the day away, and it was time to get up.