I got to my feet quickly, catching his wrist before he could free his junk. “I don’t. Or I do, but to clean your wound not to suck you off.”
“Touché.” He stopped trying to take off his pants and lowered himself onto the rim of the tub, surprisingly docile about the turn of events. “I should’ve known you wouldn’t give up on the bandage thing.”
“It’s for purely selfish reasons,” I said flippantly. “I’m doing it for all of womankind, really. My species would never forgive me if I was responsible for that handsome mug being scarred.”
Jeremiah pouted. “I would look badass with a scar there.”
A soft smile raised my lips. “You’re just the right amount of badass as is, Mr. Williams.”
Getting what I needed from his first aid kit, I cleaned his cut as tenderly and gently as I could. He leaned into my hand cupping his cheek and closed his eyes as I worked. “You’re good at this.”
“I’ve had to clean a few cuts in my day,” I said, thinking back to the crowd I used to run with. Fists were swung in bar fights more often than I was proud to admit for having called some of those guys my friends. “All done. Enjoy your shower. I’ll be right outside when you’re done.”
Before he could get any ideas of trying to lure me into the shower with him, I left the bathroom and started cleaning up while I waited for him to finish. I threw away most of the trash, opened the curtains and patio doors for some fresh air and turned the lights up before I heard him padding down the hallway.
When he was done, he emerged wearing a fresh pair of loose fitting pants and a white T-shirt. One of his hands ran through his damp hair as he poured two glasses of water and went back to the couch. He handed one to me and motioned me over to him.
“You don’t have to clean. I’ll do it tomorrow. Right now, I just want to relax.”
I accepted the glass of cold water he offered me and sank down next to him, surprised he was responding to my being here the way he was. Shadows clung to his eyes, but they were clearer now.
Reaching up, I twined my fingers into his hair, tugging and massaging softly as I wondered how to approach the question I was burning to ask. Finally, I decided that just getting it out there was best.
“Why do you shut everyone out? There are so many people who care about you and who are worried about you.”
He shrugged, dragging his eyes across the city skyline instead of looking at me. Getting him to open up wasn’t going to be simple. I had a theory, but testing it might get me kicked out.
Sighing internally, I made my decision. If it got me kicked out, so be it. I could always come back tomorrow and beg for forgiveness for being too pushy. Can’t regret the chances you don’t take.
“Is it because of your father?”
Eyes drifting shut as if the mention of his father caused him pain, he stilled before nodding once. He still didn’t say anything, but at least I had my answer.
The instinct to hug him took over, and I found myself winding my arms around his neck and curling into his lap. I just sat there, resting my head on his shoulder and willing him to feel better. Few people could relate to how he was feeling better than I could.
“I know what it’s like to have parents who don’t understand you,” I said quietly. “Or who never seem to be happy with the decisions you make. It’s easy to crawl into yourself and stay there. Because if the only people genetically programmed to know you and your needs don’t, it’s almost impossible to imagine that other people could.”
Encouraged when he draped his arms around my hips and rested his head on mine, I continued. “I had to learn to look to other people to fill that part of myself. I found Tiana for that, and my old co-workers.”
I paused before I carried on, lifting my head to look into his eyes. “And I found you for that too.”
Surprise flashed in his eyes, but I knew I was right to tell him the truth when the first real smile I’d seen from him since I’d arrived at his apartment spread on his lips. “Yeah?”
I nodded. “I care about you, Jeremiah. A lot. I was terrified when I found your car empty and all smashed up.”
Emotion clogged my throat at my admission. I wasn’t expecting to feel tears stinging the backs of my eyes and my chest constricting when I allowed the memories of that morning in. I told him I cared about him, but the rush of emotions I felt made me question just how much I actually cared about him. Much more than I thought, apparently. It was scary.
This was just supposed to be a job.A means to an end. But it has become so much more. Jeremiah has become so much more.