My Fake Fling

“I’ll put it in the SUV,” I replied. I picked up the box and walked out to the waiting Tahoe. I left the Porsche at home, knowing we were going to be loading things up.

On my way back to the house, her neighbor was standing in his front lawn. “She’s moving out, huh?” He asked the question with a smile of satisfaction, which pissed me off.

“Temporarily,” I answered.

“And the dogs?”

“Do you think it would be too difficult for you to mind your own business?” I asked. “It’s a Sunday morning. Maybe you should think about going to church. You need it.”

“Hello!” Clay walked out of the townhouse and waved. “You must be my new neighbor.”

The man was going to be friendly with the asshole that had been torturing his daughter for years? I stood my ground and watched the expression on Mr. Wedge’s face. He looked at me with a smug smile. He thought he won. Oh, I couldn’t wait until he found out this was Thea’s father.

Clay walked right up to the man and shook his hand. “Good morning,” Clay said. “I’m Clay. I’m moving in next door. Apparently, my daughter has been having trouble with the neighbors. I’m going to be living here while she works on resolving the issue. She mentioned something about an old guy that was giving her a really hard time for rescuing animals. I told her I couldn’t believe anyone would be so cold and callous because I know my daughter. I know how well she trains the animals she takes in. I just couldn’t believe anyone would be so bitter to try and ruin that. But I guess we don’t know everyone’s story. We all have our problems. I’m just glad I can move in and take over the mortgage for her while she continues to do her good work.”

Mr. Wedge looked like he was going to choke. It was taking all I had not to burst into laughter. Clay was smiling as he spoke and he certainly sounded friendly enough, but that was the thinnest veiled insult and threat wrapped into one that I had ever heard. Mr. Wedge couldn’t say shit because Clay never said his name or even acted angry.

“Well, I—” Mr. Wedge stammered.

Clay jumped right in. “Are you alone for dinner tonight?” Clay asked him.

“Why?” Mr. Wedge asked defensively.

“I figure two old guys like us need to stick together. I make a mean fried chicken. Why don’t you come on over and we’ll have a beer and chicken and get to know each other? My daughter has a nice patio in the backyard. There’s a nice big fence, so we’ll have plenty of privacy. It will be two old codgers with a few cold beers. What do you say?”

Rich and Thea were standing in the doorway. The look on Thea’s face told me she was not happy to see her father making nice with her nemesis. Rich was smirking. I had a feeling he knew exactly what his father was doing. It was an effective strategy. Clay was killing him with kindness. He was going on the defense right out of the gate.

“That sounds good,” Mr. Wedge replied. “I’ll bring a side dish.”

“It’s a date,” Clay said and slapped Mr. Wedge’s shoulder hard enough to make him stumble.

“Yes,” Mr. Wedge mumbled and scurried back into his house.

“That was smooth,” I said to Clay.

He shrugged. “I thought it was a good idea we got to know each other sooner rather than later. I want him to understand Thea isn’t running and he didn’t win. He also needs to know he can try, but he will not be pushing me around. I don’t have any animals. He’s going to have a very hard time finding anything to complain about with me. Him, on the other hand, I’ll make sure he understands those bushes are technically on Thea’s property. That mess of a front yard is something he’ll want to make sure he cleans up as well. My mom used to always tell me to never throw stones in a glass house. I don’t think Mr. Wedge learned that lesson. I’m going to teach him.”

I chuckled and followed him back inside. “I have no doubt you will.”

“Gee, Dad, you couldn’t wait to be best friends with my enemy,” Thea pouted.

“Relax, sweetheart, it’s always a good idea to keep your enemies close,” Clay told her.

“He’s right,” I said. “I think your neighbor just met his match.”

It was late afternoon before we were finally finished getting Clay set up. No one wanted to stick around and risk the chance of seeing the neighbor again. On the way back to my house, I held Thea’s hand. “Are you okay?”

“I am,” she said. “I think this is going to work out really well. My dad seemed happy. I haven’t seen him truly happy in a long time. I think he likes the idea of being independent after being under Stacey’s thumb for so long. This is going to be good for him.”

“And Mr. Wedge,” I teased.

She groaned and shook her head. “Leave it to my dad to make friends with him.”

“I thought it was very clever. Mr. Wedge didn’t know what hit him. And he is no longer your problem. You and the dogs have a safe home. They are free to run and shit all over. Outside, that is. The neighbors are far enough away they won’t be complaining about the barking.”

“Thank you for this,” she said. “It means a lot to me and the dogs.”

The moment we walked through my door, I knew something was off because when we left, there had not been snow in the house.