“I’m never leaving this bed again.”
Mateo flips off the light switch and approaches his side of the bed, climbing in beside me. My eyes skate over the beautiful planes of his body before they disappear under the covers, and I turn in his arms immediately, leaning in to give him a kiss.
His arms lock around my waist and he yanks me on top of him. “I can live with that. I’ll have to leave, but you can stay here so you’re always ready for me.”
“It sounds like the way to live life,” I inform him, only half-joking.
“Still didn’t find a dress you like?” he guesses.
“There are too many! And they’re all so pretty. And people act like you’re supposed to recognize your perfect dress on sight—like, you should look in the mirror and see your reflection and just start sobbing, because there it is, that’s your dress. If you don’t have that reaction, clearly you don’t have a soul.”
“I know it’s your wedding dress, but it is just a dress. I’d marry you if you showed up naked.”
I grin, trailing my index finger down his bare chest. “Oh, I bet you would.”
He catches my hand, but he seems pensive, maybe a little annoyed. Behind those beautiful brown eyes of his, the cogs are turning, and I can’t imagine it’s over wedding plans.
“What’s on your mind?” I ask him.
He watches me for a moment, then leans up, brushing his lips against mine. I stifle a sigh of pleasure. I want to get lost in him, but I can’t do that and also be mentally present if he wants to talk to me.
“Hm?” I encourage, running a hand through his hair and watching his face attentively.
“I found Vince.”
Fear slices through me before I can temper it, and I can tell by the tensing of his features that he picks up on it. A flicker of aggravation crosses his features, but then it’s gone and he’s in control again.
Swallowing, I ease off his chest to rest more fully on the bed. “What did you do?”
“Nothing yet.” His tone is completely even, as if we’re discussing the weather. “I wanted to, but considering how things went last time, I held off.”
I sigh heavily, moving off him completely and sinking into my spot beside him. “Why’d you have to tell me?”
“You know why,” he states.
“If you want my permission to kill him, I can’t give it to you. I know what he did was terrible, I understand why you want to, but… I’m honestly heartbroken for him. All I want for him is peace and happiness. I want him to find someone who loves him the way I love you. I want him to be happy and move on from us.”
“Considering what he put you through most recently, I don’t give a single fuck about his happiness,” Mateo states.
“I understand that.” Sliding a glance over at him, I add, “But you, of all people, know I don’t hold a grudge.”
“I’m allowed to fuck with you; no one else is.”
I smile slightly as his hand drifts over to grab mine, our fingers naturally lacing together. “I know that. I really don’t think he’ll be back again though. You didn’t see us together this time. It was bad. Our fucked up relationship when we were living together and you were with Meg seemed like a honeymoon by comparison. We did this to him, Mateo. We made him like this. He was sweet and sad and vulnerable, and we turned him dark. We hurt him, a lot, and the men in your family don’t cope so well with that.”
“They also don’t let go,” he states.
I hate it because I know he’s right. I’ve heard stories, I’ve lived amongst them for years—he is not wrong. It just doesn’t change anything for me. It makes me scared, it fills me with dread and concern for the future, but it doesn’t suddenly make me okay with him killing my first love.
“I just want everyone to be happy,” I tell him.
“And I don’t want him to come back and try to steal you away from me again. Or, worse, decide if he can’t have you, I can’t either. He could hurt you worse than he has, Mia.”
“I don’t believe he will.”
“We’ve already established you don’t have a realistic barometer for what people are capable of. I’m not trying to be an asshole here, but come on. You always see the good in people, Mia, even after they’ve shown you the worst.”
“You like that about me,” I remind him.
“I like it when it’s me you see the good in. Not Vince.”
“But that’s not how it works.”
Rolling his eyes and sighing, he says, “I know, but it’s still damned annoying.”
“I really don’t think he’ll come back this time. Can’t we just give him one last chance? You’ve already said I’m going to have a guard on me at all times, so he won’t be able to get me alone again, and I’d never agree to go anywhere with him like I did this time. I honestly just thought he was back in town and stopping to say hi. I would never fall for that again. If next time I see him he has a wife and five kids, I still won’t go anywhere alone with him.”