Shaking my head, I pull close to him even as my gaze drops to his bare chest. “I don’t want to start building our life in a place that has such an awful memory for you.”
He dips his head to kiss his way down my neck, murmuring, “I have plenty of good memories there already, and we’ll make so many more there won’t be room for that one.”
Pushing a hand through his dark hair, I gaze at him with undisguised concern. “I’m afraid it hasn’t really hit you yet. Sometimes it takes a few days for a tragedy to really sink in, and—”
Interrupting me, he says, “I really don’t want to talk about it. I’m dealing with it. I’m fine. I’m just not going to let it consume me. Yeah, it was sad and hard, but it was business. It was going to happen sooner or later with the shit he was pulling, it just had to happen a little sooner. Now, let’s go to bed and not talk about this.”
I take his hand and follow him to the bed, climbing in with him. I haven’t officially moved in—Mateo thought I should wait, though I don’t know what I’m waiting for—but I’ve spent the last two nights here anyway. Tomorrow we’ll have to go back to the mansion for family dinner anyway, then I’ll stay there since Dad’s funeral is Monday.
“I hope we don’t have to go to any more funerals until we’re old and gray. I don’t want to experience any more death,” I tell Sal, curling up beside him.
His strong arms encircle my body and he pulls me against his chest, kissing the crown of my head. “Yeah, I hope so, too.”
“What did you think of Mia?”
“I liked her.” He trails the tips of his finger along my arm, relaxing me. “I’m curious to see her around Mateo tomorrow. I’m still not sure I can get behind your twisted pairing, but I’ll keep an open mind.”
I smile sleepily, my head resting a little more heavily against his chest. “Meg will be there so I don’t know if you’ll see it. He moved the dumb maid into his bedroom. He makes bad choices.”
Chuckling lightly, Sal continues to caress my arm. “Yes, on that we can agree.”
I attempt a nod, but my head is too heavy. I tip my head on its side instead, yawning. “He needs Mia. She’s the perfect light, healing counterpart to his destructive darkness.”
“Preparing your wedding toast already?” he asks lightly.
“I like toast,” I murmur, almost unintelligibly.
“What?”
I pry my eyes open, but yawn again. “Oh, crap, I forgot what we were talking about. You said toast.”
Laughing in earnest now, Sal leans down and kisses me. “Go to sleep.”
I drape my arm across his shoulder, resting my face on his chest and closing my eyes. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
—
I rarely volunteer to do drinks in the study, but I do tonight just so I can keep an eye on Mateo and Sal. I expect everything should be okay since Mateo does want peace, but it’s hard to trust when I know how much he hates people keeping secrets from him, and I kept a doozy.
Since he let me have Sal, I’m feeling excessively grateful tonight. Probably also a little because Sal’s mom was so awful yesterday, and I’m desperate for this dinner to go well.
Of course I serve Mateo first, but I also offer up a friendly smile as I hand him his drink.
He’s him, though, so this only makes him watch me like I’m up to something.
I don’t know who is supposed to be next, but I bring Sal a drink since I like him best. I lean in and steal a kiss, too.
“Dosing me, huh?” he teases.
I grin. “Obviously.”
Once I serve everyone, I make my way to Sal’s wing chair and sit on the arm. It’s strange to watch him sitting here, completely at ease chatting with Adrian, when we all know two days ago Adrian put a bullet in his dad’s head. It seems like he should struggle more with it. If my father mattered to me, I certainly couldn’t sit here across from the man I knew killed him, drinking scotch and making small talk. I guess I still don’t see Sal the way I see my family—when he’s cool and detached after what I know he’s experienced, it feels wrong. I know a different side of him, and this one is foreign. I didn’t want him to stick out like a sore thumb, but it’s almost unsettling how seamlessly he fits in with these guys.
He got to meet Alec tonight, but Joey hasn’t shown up yet. Dante won’t be here tonight, but since tomorrow is Dad’s funeral, he’ll be there. I am not looking forward to any part of tomorrow. Even though Dante doesn’t have a say, I know he’ll disapprove of my relationship with Sal. I feel bad for making Sal go with me. I’m tempted to tell him I’ll go to this one alone, since we do have his dad’s funeral coming up, too.