The Accidental Girlfriend

LAUREN: Done. Now go and build a wall or whatever it is you’re doing. I have to shower and go to work.

MASON: How are you gonna do that with Henry on your head?

LAUREN: He’s a cat. Say the word ‘shower,’ and it puts the fear of God in him.

MASON: True enough.

MASON: I have to get back to work. I’ll pick you up at six tomorrow. We’ve been roped into helping decorate the party room.

LAUREN: As long as your Uncle Charlie doesn’t offer me another checkbook full of sexual favors, I’ll do it.

MASON: Cannot guarantee, but Mom insisted, so sucks to be you.

LAUREN: Yeah, but as my fake boyfriend, you get my complaining. Sucks to be YOU, actually.

MASON: I didn’t think this through.

LAUREN: :D :D :D :D :D

***

I tugged on the collar of my shirt. The pristine white collar was stiff and uncomfortable, and there was no way I was going to last all night wearing this.

This was why I didn’t wear the clothing my mother sent. Why I’d even thought this was a good idea was beyond me. There was no chance in hell I was going to keep this on a second longer than necessary.

More to the point: I was twenty-eight. Why the fuck was my mother sending me shirts?

I unbuttoned the shirt and tossed it over the back of the armchair. Two knocks at my door made me pause. I needed a shirt, but if my neighbor heard that knocking…

“Two seconds!” I called, running for my bedroom.

I pulled a white, short-sleeved shirt from my closet and shrugged it on, masterfully managing to button it halfway before I tugged the door open.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

Claudia shuffled from one side to the other, pushing her blonde hair behind her ear. “Can we talk?”

“No,” I said firmly. “I’m on my way out.”

“Please, Mason?” She wrapped some of her hair around her finger. “Just five minutes.”

The lock clicked from across the hall, and I did the only thing I could—I let her in. “Five minutes. I have plans tonight.”

“With your new girlfriend?”

“What I do is none of your business. What do you want?”

“I want to talk to you.”

I buttoned the rest of my shirt and tucked it into my pants. “Talk, then.”

“I messed up,” she said in a small voice. “I never should have cheated on you.”

I stared at her flatly. “Try again.”

“Mason, please!” She stepped forward, reaching for me, but I moved back out of her grasp. “You can’t tell me that woman is more important to you than I am.”

“By that woman, I assume you mean Lauren.”

“Whatever her name is. Yes.” She moved toward me again. “Six years, Mason. That’s something to think about.”

I put my wallet and phone in my pockets and grabbed my keys from the coffee tables. “You’re right, Claudia. It is. Six years is a long time to be with someone, but you should have thought about the sanctity of our relationship before you decided to wrap your legs around someone else’s body because they had more money than I do.”

“Mason, it wasn’t—”

“We’re done here.” I opened the door. “I have to pick up Lauren, and I have no idea to hear any more of your excuses. You’re only here because I’ve moved on.”

Claudia hauled the strap of her purse up onto her shoulder and pouted at me. “We’re not done here, Mason.”

“We were done when you shoved your boss’ dick down your throat. Out.”

She did as I’d said, shooting me one dark look as she disappeared out into the hallway and toward the elevator. The doors opened for her to step inside right as the door opposite me swung open.

Mrs. Allerton hobbled out, staring down the hall after Claudia. “What did that hussy want?”

Usually, I’d correct her, but… “She was trying to get me back, Mrs. Allerton.”

“Did you take her back?”

“No, ma’am. I kicked her out.”

She grunted. “Good. Can I give you some advice?”

“I’d love it,” I said politely. She was going to give it anyway.

“You wouldn’t buy a rotten vegetable. Don’t date one, either, especially if you’ve already thrown it out already.”

How about that? That was some good advice.

“Solid advice, Mrs. Allerton. Thank you.” I stepped out and locked the door. “Thankfully, that ship has sailed and sunk.”

She tapped her chin. “She was here the other day. Shall I shoot her if she comes back?”

“Probably best you don’t. The building manager doesn’t know about your gun, does he?”

“Hmm. He doesn’t.” She sighed. “Stupid people. Stupid rules.”

I nodded along as if I agreed. It really was the easiest option, and my mind was already whirring with the presence of Claudia.

“Are you off somewhere nice?”

“My grandpa’s birthday party,” I said. “And I really have to be going before I’m late.” I checked my watch. “Thanks for the advice, Mrs. Allerton. I’ll keep it in mine.”