Amusement shook my head. “You really are a terrible influence. I think I’m going to have to rethink these sleepovers.”
She pressed a hand over her heart. “You wouldn’t dare.”
“Don’t test me.” It was purely a tease.
Everything about her softened. “How are my boys?”
A smile ticked up at the corner of my mouth. “Good. Kale has the weekend off, so I’m sure he’s off making up for any fun I’m not having. Ollie is . . . it was twelve years yesterday.”
A soft puff of air blew from her mouth. “Oh . . . I didn’t even realize. How is he doing?”
“As well as can be expected, I guess.”
Or maybe worse than could be expected. I didn’t fucking know.
God knew that it still ate me alive.
A beat of silence hovered in the atmosphere, that same sadness that was always there, lurking in the background, before Frankie broke it. She came bursting back into the living room with her backpack bouncing on her shoulders, a poster board in one hand and her doll clutched to her chest with the other.
“Look it, Daddy.”
Proudly, Frankie lifted her painting that was nothing but thick swashes of color.
“That’s beautiful, Sweet Pea.”
“What are we gonna do today?” she dove right in. “You wants to go swimming?”
I swung her into my arms. “Is that what you want to do? Go to the lake?”
She grinned that grin. The one that knocked all the foolishness free and the sense back into me. My heart heavy and full.
Devoted.
“Yes!”
I ruffled a hand through her rebellious hair. “Then, it sounds like we’re going to the lake.”
My headlights cut through the emerging night.
Twilight was at its deepest, the entire earth cast in that shadowy blue that stifled the air in the moments just before the night fully took hold of the day.
Frankie and I had spent the entire day at the lake, playing in the water, hiking, building a fire, and grilling the burgers I’d picked up before we’d taken the twenty-minute drive out to our favorite spot. The lake calm, the beach secluded, the sky cloudless.
It’d been the perfect kind of afternoon.
That same twenty-minute drive home had rocked Frankie to sleep in the back of the truck, her little head bobbing to one side where she dozed in her car seat.
I pulled my truck into the driveway at the side of the house and killed the engine before going directly for Frankie, unbuckling her and then lifting her into my arms.
She felt so small and light like this, when all that energy had finally drained and she was just the tiny little thing that had been given into my care. The one who needed me to protect and shield her. Her shelter and her harbor.
I angled her to the side so I could slide the key into the lock and let us into the stillness of the small house that I did my very best to make a home. Half the time it felt like I didn’t have a single clue what the fuck I was doing, but I got up every single morning and did it anyway.
Frankie barely stirred when I laid her on her twin bed and tugged the flip-flops from her feet, changed her into her pajamas, and tucked her under the cool sheet. Her head was on her pillow, those wild, tangled locks all around her. I brushed them back from her face, gazing down at her and wondering how something so good could come out of a situation that was so utterly fucked.
Wondering if she was my blessing.
My reprieve.
Or if the insane worry that constantly roiled inside me was another element of the curse that would haunt me for the rest of my days.
Pushing it down in the depths of my spirit, I leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, silently promising her it didn’t make a difference either way.
That it didn’t change my devotion to her.
This mad kind of love that took up every cell in my body. It came into existence the first time I’d held her in my arms.
Sparked to life that cold winter night.
A permanent flame.
One I’d thought had been forever dimmed.
On a sigh, I pushed to my feet and shuffled from her room, leaving the door open a crack and a light on in the hall in case she needed me. I headed into the kitchen, pulled a cold beer from the fridge, and popped the cap.
I took a swig as I peered out the kitchen window. It was the exact same picture that’d been there since the day I’d moved in. Though, I doubted I could ever consider the view the same.
9
Rynna
The oven buzzed.
My nerves went haywire, shooting into overdrive as I grabbed the mitts and pulled the pie from the oven. The sweet, decadent scent spilled into the kitchen and basked it in a homey warmth.