Right. He hadn’t brought Keith up to speed yet. Mostly because time had passed in a wild blur. “The man who attacked you—the man I believe left you in Carly Shay’s apartment—is dead.”
Relief had Keith’s shoulders slumping. “Thank God. I-I was discharged thirty minutes ago, and when I saw you here, I just had to stop and ask…I was afraid to go home thinking that Barclay might come after me…”
“The evidence I’ve collected didn’t indicate that Ethan Barclay was your abductor.”
“But—but I told you…he threatened me.” Keith swiped a hand over his face.
Victor hesitated. “I was going to wait and have this talk down at the FBI branch. If you’ve been discharged, as you say…then how about we head to the Bureau’s office?”
But Keith violently shook his head. “No, you tell me, now. Tell me what’s going on! If Ethan Barclay didn’t attack me, then who did?”
“I believe it was a man named Curtis Thatch.”
Keith blinked.
“According to intel I’m still gathering, Curtis has actually racked up quite the body count. After abducting you, he also took Ethan Barclay. He planned to kill Ethan, but, well, Ethan had other ideas…”
Keith’s shaking fingers rose and touched his temple. “Ethan killed him. He killed this—Curtis Thatch?”
“Yes, doctor. That’s exactly what happened.” His eyes swept over the shrink’s face. “You look really pale to me. Are you sure that you have the okay to be discharged?”
Keith stumbled back. “I-I’m fine.”
The guy didn’t look so fine. “I want you to come with me,” Victor said. “We’ll talk at the Bureau office.”
Keith’s hand fell. “Where is Carly?”
“I’m not at liberty to say that right now.”
Keith lunged forward and grabbed Victor’s shirt. “Is she all right?”
Wow. The doctor seriously needed to calm the hell down. “Ease up. Just what meds did they give you in this place?”
Keith blinked, then he looked down at his hands—hands that had fisted Victor’s shirt. “I just…with everything that has happened…all the time in the hospital…I started to worry.”
“Right. Worrying about your patient’s safety, that’s normal and—”
“No.” Keith’s voice was a hoarse whisper. “I shouldn’t say it…I shouldn’t…confidentiality…” Then he began rubbing his temple again.
Alarms were going off in Victor’s head. This guy—what was he holding back?
But then Keith squeezed his eyes shut. “Was she there when that man—that Curtis Thatch was killed?”
“Yes.” He wanted to see where the doc was going with this bit.
Keith sucked in a sharp breath. “Then you need to bring Carly Shay in for an immediate psychiatric evaluation. The woman…” His eyes opened. “She could be on the verge of a psychotic break. She had one before, when she was seventeen years old. Carly Shay can be very, very dangerous, and for some time now, I’ve been concerned that she might be letting her…darker…urges take over.”
“Carly Shay didn’t kill Curtis Thatch.” They should be clear on that. “And if you’re saying she’s some kind of imminent threat, if she’s said something to you in a session that makes you believe she could be dangerous…then you know that is information that you should reveal to me. That’s not protected by client privilege at all.”
Keith glanced down at the gleaming floor.
“Has she?” Victor said, his voice snapping out. “Has Carly Shay ever said something to you that makes you believe the woman could have plans to kill?” He’d seen Carly as the victim. But…
“Yes,” Keith admitted softly. “She has. And I’m afraid now…now she’ll be pushed over the edge…”
***
Carly opened her eyes and saw the sunlight streaming through the window. She stretched, her body was full of delicious aches, and her hands brushed against Ethan’s warm body.
Her head turned so that she could better see him. His dark hair was tousled, his tanned skin such a stark contrast to the white sheets. His eyes were closed, and she noticed just how incredibly long his lashes really were.
Her gaze slid over him. He was on his back, and the sheet had dipped low at his waist. She’d touched his scars last night—those on his stomach and chest. She’d felt them beneath her fingers, but, even when they’d been in the bath, the lights had been out so she hadn’t seen them, not fully.
Now she did, and Carly felt tears sting her eyes. There were so many scars. Long and thick. Deep from the look of them.
Ethan had come very, very close to dying.
A tear slid down her cheek.
“Don’t.”
At his gravel-rough order, her gaze jerked back to his face. Only this time, his eyes were wide open and on her.
Ethan’s hand lifted and his fingers slid over her cheek, catching the tear that had fallen there. “Don’t cry for me, baby. The scars—they don’t hurt.”
“You almost died.” But she wasn’t just talking about the older attack by Daniel Duvato. She was talking about—dear God, had it just been yesterday? “You were in that chair, and he was going to kill you. If I—if I hadn’t gone back to the brownstone…”
“Why did you come back?”
She drew in a shuddering breath. “Because I knew you hadn’t left me. Victor was so sure you had, but it didn’t fit. Not for us.”
“You had faith in me.” He seemed…surprised. Why?
Her body moved closer to his. “You think you’re the only one who knows what love is, Ethan?”
His eyes widened. “What are you saying?”
“I’m saying…I should have taken you up on that offer sooner. Me and you, disappearing. Starting over. Letting the past go and moving on.” Seeing what a future together would be like. “You’re back in my life, and I don’t want to let you go.”
His eyes glinted down at her. “I want to hear the words, too.”
She smiled. Smiling seemed to come so much easier to her, as long as Ethan was near. “I love you.”
“Fuck yes.” He dragged her closer and kissed her. Deep and hot and just the way she wanted.
She stretched against him, her body feeling so at ease with him. Everything was easy with him. It was—
Ethan had pulled away. He stared down at her for a moment, and his face hardened.
“What is it?” Carly asked him, hesitant now.
“I saw your face. When I killed Curtis, I saw you, baby.”
She swallowed. Carly had known this would be coming, sooner or later. She’d rather hoped for later.
“How can you really love someone,” Ethan began, voice slow, rough, “when you fear him so much?”
“Ethan…”
“I scare you.”
She wasn’t going to lie to him. If this was going to work, if they were going to work, there could be no lies. “Yes.”
He flinched.
She kissed him. Hard. “That doesn’t mean I can’t still love you.”
But he pulled away. He grabbed his jeans and jerked them on and marched toward the window.
“When you love someone…” His gaze was on the city. “That person is supposed to make you feel safe. Protected.”
She wrapped a sheet around her body and sat on the edge of the bed. Carly wished they could go back to some cuddling. Maybe a little pillow talk. But they had to get past this. Or there wouldn’t be any going forward for them. “You do make me feel safe.”
He glanced back at her. “And I scare you to death.”
“Violence scares me.” She shot to her feet and confronted him, knowing exactly how important this moment was for them. “Seeing a man’s throat get cut open, right in front of me, hell, yes, that shit scares me. If it didn’t, I don’t think I’d be normal.”
He laughed. Bitterly. “We both know I’m not normal.”
She grabbed his arms and let the sheet fall. So what if someone glanced up—way up—and caught a
show? “Stop it.”
A furrow appeared between his brows.
“Stop always playing the bad guy. I get that you like the role, but with me, leave it at the door.”
His eyes widened.
“I know what you’re capable of doing, Ethan. I know better than just about anyone. And you really want to know what scares me most about you? It’s not the violence because I know you would never hurt me. That’s not who you are. But…I know…I know just how far you’d go for me. I know you’d fight, you’d kill—” A hard smile curved her lips. “And I know you have done all of that, for me. To protect me. And it scares the hell out me, knowing that I’m the one who pushes you so far.”
He didn’t say anything.
She realized her nails were digging into his arm. “Do I push you too far?” Because that was her fear. For her, he’d do anything. Even lose his soul in order to keep her safe.
She knew there were no lines he wouldn’t cross.
For me.
That knowledge did scare her.
Because, deep inside, she had long ago realized her dark truth, too. For Ethan, there were no lines that she wouldn’t cross.
“You don’t push me,” Ethan said, voice sounding almost rusty. “You...make me feel whole. When I didn’t even know that part of me was missing.”
She stood on her tip-toes and brushed a gentle kiss over his cheek. “We can make it,” she whispered. “I know we can.”
Because she didn’t want to be with anyone else. Sure, she’d survive without Ethan, but she wouldn’t be happy. And there would always be that empty spot inside of her, a spot he’d claimed in her heart so long ago.
“I would do anything for you.” His words were a confession, and she realized that. “No laws I wouldn’t break. No sins I wouldn’t commit. Can you really live with that?”