Even if it’s not the right thing, I’m going to try anyway.
Twenty-Seven
Dylan
“What are you doing today?”
Navie’s voice is chipper, especially for nine in the morning. As a bartender, she doesn’t keep early morning hours.
“I’m screwing off today,” I say. “I start work next week, so this is my last hurrah.”
Navie laughs.
“Really I’m just trying to get my life in order over here. I made a list of a bunch of things I need to do before my life get hectic again.” I tap the steering wheel as I wait at a stop sign. “Why couldn’t I have been born a rich princess and just paid someone to do my life’s paperwork for me?”
“Girl, don’t even start with that. That’s my dream right there. I’ll still work for a living. I just want to find someone to come over and handle my life. Like … a wife. I need a wife.”
“Same,” I say with a laugh.
I pass a sign for Bluebird Hill. My face lights up as I remember our night up there. I’m still picking mud out of my hair, which is slightly annoying, but I wouldn’t change those memories for anything.
That’s the epitome of why I fell for Peck. His silliness and fun-loving side are balanced with a part of him that’s so effortlessly sexy. He’s the perfect package.
I was so happy last night when we got home. On top of the world, even. But then Molly McCarter showed up and put enough of a wobble in my universe that I’m not quite perched on the top of Mount Happiness anymore.
“Why are you up so early?” I ask Navie.
“The neighbor’s dog, actually. It started barking at six thirty. I’m not thrilled that I got virtually no sleep, but damn, I feel accomplished already today. Is this what the rest of the world feels like when they get up at the crack ass of dawn?”
“Not usually,” I say, laughing. “We’re usually more bitter about it.”
“Well, I don’t think I’d want to do it every day.”
My phone buzzes in my cupholder. I look down to see Joanie’s name on the screen. Goodman’s Gas Station is up ahead, and I pull my car into the back entrance. I park next to the side of the building and put it in park.
“Hang on, Navie,” I say.
I look down at the screen again.
Joanie: Hi, Dylan. Did you decide anything on the house? He has someone else interested but wanted to give you first dibs. Please let me know.
I stare at the phone. In the back of my brain, I’ve known I needed to respond to this. It’s sat there and prickled me over and over again. I don’t know why I haven’t sent her an answer. But I have to now. Time’s up.
My thumb runs over the screen as I consider my response. Even though I already know what I have to do, I think about each option.
If this text had come through yesterday, I probably would’ve told her I pass out of some orgasm-fueled optimism. But today is not last night, and my optimism game is waning. It’s not dead, but it’s not killing the world either.
“Are you there?” Navie asks.
“Yeah. Hang on.”
A pang of anxiety sits in the middle of my abdomen, wearing a hole in my stomach since I opened the door and saw Molly on Peck’s porch. The most frustrating thing about it all is that I trust Peck. I do. I know he would never hurt me intentionally. But the fact remains that Charlie didn’t necessarily set out to hurt me either.
Me: Hi, Joanie. Thanks for the text, and I’m sorry for not responding more promptly. I thought I had a solution to my housing issue, but it turns out, I don’t. I’d love to rent the house. I know I haven’t seen it, but as long as it’s not full of cats, we’ll be fine.
Joanie: Oh, great! I think you’ll love it. I’ll get with Peter and have him get ahold of you. It’s okay to give him your number, right?
Me: Yes, please.
Joanie: Great. He’ll be in touch soon.
Me: Thanks again.
I stare at the screen. The deed has been done.
“Dylannn ….” Navie sings. “Just call me back, fool.”
“I’m here. I’m here,” I say, bringing the phone to my ear. “I just, um … Well, Joanie texted me about the house she found, and I had to make a decision.”
My throat burns as I swallow.
It’s the right choice. I know that. But it doesn’t mean I like the idea of leaving Peck.
Last night, sleeping in his arms, still felt right. Right but just … unsettled. He told Molly that things were different now, but she’s had unlimited access to him for over twenty years. Will she really give up and bow out? She may not have loved him, but she’s owned him, more or less, I think. And me? I’ve only known him for five minutes.