“Later,” I say as he leaves.
Once I’m alone, I survey the room. I wonder if Hadley would be happy here. I try to imagine her watching the sun go down out the window over the sink or hearing her sing while she takes a shower.
Lance’s words come back to mind. I haven’t gotten in a fight in a long time. My arrest record as of late is pretty clean, and even when it was active, it wasn’t for anything really serious, I guess. The car wreck wasn’t my fault, and I’ve only lost money a couple of times in poker in the past year. Both times to Walker. Fucking asshole.
Maybe there’s potential for me. A small amount, but possibly enough to work with. Enough to be in Hadley’s life in some way.
I peel my T-shirt off and study the ink on my arm. A new cluster of tattoos sits on the underside of my arm just on the side of the ridge of my bicep. They’re positioned so if look down, they’re what I see.
A rose for my mother lays longways. Just beneath it is a four-leaf clover with a little pink bow wrapped around the stem.
“Let it be,” I say to myself. “Just let it be.”
Rolling my eyes, knowing damn good and well I can’t do that, I head to the shower.
Twenty-Seven
Hadley
“He’s home,” I say to myself.
I’ve thought this idea to death. My stomach twists in excitement but tosses the opposite way toward anxiety as I pull my car in behind Machlan’s truck.
I haven’t seen him since he dropped me off last night after dinner at Nana’s. His truck was at Doc Burns’ this morning, presumably with Nana, and I warred with myself whether to call Machlan to check on her. I finally broke down during lunch with Emily and sent him a text.
Turning the car off, the grocery bags rattling in the back seat, I pick up my phone. His last text is still pulled up.
Machlan:Nana was ordered to take it easy for a few days. She’ll be okay. I’ll probably stay home for a while this evening if you get bored.
My thumb hovers over the keys as I rethink my plan. I read his text again. Nowhere does it say to go buy groceries and bring them over. It doesn’t ask me to make him dinner. It doesn’t even technically ask me to come by, although I think it does. I hope it does.
I nearly came by a dozen times last night. It was really hard to think about being with him and knowing he was in the same town and all I really had to do was drive a few miles to see him again. But was it the right choice? I didn’t know. It felt like it. It still does. But will I regret it tomorrow?
My attention going back to the phone, I decide how to tell him I’m here without looking overconfident. Before I can type something out, it dings in my hand.
Machlan:Are you going to sit in my driveway all night or what?
I look up and see him standing on the front porch. He’s leaning against a column barefooted in jeans and a plain white shirt. I almost whimper at the sight.
Instead of getting out, I text him back.
That depends. Have you had dinner?
Machlan: No. Will you get up here, please?
Maybe. I laugh, my thumbs flying over the keypad. I got presumptuous and thought we could have dinner. I watch the chat bubble bounce as he types his reply.
“Ah!” I jump as my car door opens, and I nearly fall out. He catches me with a chuckle.
“Scare you?”
“Yes.” I laugh as I get out of the car. He helps me to my feet. “I’m not intruding on anything, am I?”
“Kind of.” He glances in the back seat. “What’s this?”
I swallow hard. “Groceries. I thought we could make dinner. Together.”
It takes longer than I want for his face to break into a smile. It’s the soft one, the shy one, the one I love the most, and it’s totally worth the wait. It wraps me in the fuzziest feeling, embracing me with everything right in the world.
He grabs the bags out of the car without saying anything. I lock it and follow him to the house. As we’re going up the stairs, I remember what he said when I got here.
“Hey,” I say. “You said I was intruding on something.”
He holds the door open for me. “You were. But I’ll set it aside for now.”
“Oh, by all means. I can leave,” I say as I enter the foyer. Before I can turn around and follow that with another comment, I feel his breath against my ear.
“Don’t even think about it.”
A flurry of goose bumps covers my skin. I feel myself come to life as though a button has been pushed, and I grin like an idiot.