I could distract him, but the only thing I could think that would entice him to sign and leave was to use my feminine wiles. I was too smart to do that. He said he was going to sign, and so maybe all I needed to do was bide my time. It had been years since I’d had a good seven-course meal, and this one was turning out to be delicious. Certainly, I could have a meal with him without revealing more than I wanted him to know.
Deciding to be friendly but distant, I moved us away from the tricky discussion of our past. “I understand Chase is married now.”
His hazel eyes watched me for a moment longer. He probably wondered why I was veering our conversation in another direction. Finally, with a small nod, he said, “Yes. She’s young.”
He said the words like he was challenging me and my idea that we’d been too young six years ago.
“She’s nineteen.”
My eyes widened. I tried to do the math. Chase had to be in his thirties, but more than that, he always seemed like an old soul.
Ash laughed. “That was the expression we all had, but Sara is good for him. I guess she’s mature for her age.”
I wondered if that comment was a barb meant to suggest I’d been immature. But he was the one who left.
“Anyway, he’s lightened up a lot. He’s happy. Really happy. They’re expecting a baby soon.”
His tone was authentic in his happiness for his brother, but there was a sadness to it too.
“What about your other brothers? Hunter? I heard he got out of the military.”
“He was discharged after an injury. He’s working for the company. He’s getting married too, actually. I’m glad. He’s had a hard time of it and Grace is good for him.”
“I guess that just leaves Kade.”
He laughed. “Kade is a confirmed bachelor, at least he is now. He’s the baby of the family in every sense of the word.”
“It sounds like you’re all doing well.”
He pushed his soup aside after one or two bites. “You don’t know if I’m doing well. You haven’t asked.”
I gave him a look. “I can see you’re doing well.”
“I’m not married. I don’t even have prospects. My best friend is MIA, and a woman I care about is chomping at the bit to end our dinner.”
“I just have a lot going on.”
He nodded. “All the more reason to allow yourself some time to relax and enjoy. You’ll have your money before we leave, so why not take a breath?”
He was right that I could use a moment to stop running around trying to fix something. And the food so far was delicious.
He pulled out his phone. “I have pictures of Chase and Sara if you’d like to see them. They were married at the Hampton house.”
“We sold our place.” I moved closer to him to look at the photos on his phone. He was right, Sara looked very young. But as he scrolled through the pictures, I could see she had intelligent eyes. There was no doubt Chase was head over heels by the way he looked at her. I wondered if Ash had ever looked at me like that.
“If you or Ben ever want to stay at our place out there, let me know.”
I looked up at him, not realizing how close our heads were bent together. I started to pull back, but he swiped the screen.
“Here is Hunter and Grace. I took this at their engagement party.”
“She’s lovely. They both look happy.”
“Yeah, they do.” His voice was sad again. “I envy them.”
“Oh?” Again, I turned, forgetting how close our faces were. This time, I couldn’t turn away from his gaze. I hated how lost his eyes looked.
“I had all that,” he said, gently tugging on a tendril of my hair.
My heart hammered in my chest, wanting to open to him. My head was screaming, “danger, danger.”
“I’m sorry, Beth.”
“For what?” my voice sounded breathy.
“For hurting you. For fucking us up. For still wanting you even though you don’t want me.”
Somehow our faces were closer. Like a magnet, I was drawn to him. Of course, I wanted him. That was the problem. “I never said that.”
His thumb traced my bottom lip. “You don’t want to want me, then.”
That was true. “We can’t go back,” I said softly.
“So, let’s go forward.” His lips pressed against mine.
11
Ash – Friday
Thank fuck, was my thought as I tasted her sweet lips again. My need for her was all-consuming. This was all I wanted in life. To be with Beth. Talking with her. Kissing her. Worshiping her body until she cried out my name as I brought her to climax over and over.
I knew once my lips left hers, she’d protest or find a reason to push me away. So, I kept kissing her until she moaned in my mouth. Until her body went soft and pliant next to mine.