Her First Noel

A waitress comes and takes our order, smiling at me the whole time, and I reach across the table and squeeze both of Holly’s hands between mine, bringing them to my mouth and kissing each finger, watching her smile with each touch of my lips.

Her lips pull into a straight line. “Just promise me something…”

“If I can. What is it?”

“Just tonight, let’s not dump this on Dad. Let’s just play along until after Christmas. Take me to Mom’s. She said I can borrow her car. She needs some money…” She must catch the dubious look in my eyes, because she trails off. “I just know Dad’s going to lose his mind. And I feel like the whole business could be hurt, all because my own selfish…”

I stare at her and she lets out a frustrated huff.

“Please. I want a nice Christmas. Such as it is.”

I relent. “Okay. Just until after Christmas. Then, I’m taking care of it. I’m not living without you and I’m not living like we’re some dirty little secret.”

Holly smiles and I look out the window onto the street. Standing next to a car, grinning wide with a Starbucks in her hand, is Amanda. And she’s looking right at us.

I give her a dead stare and she smiles wider, then laughs and gets into her car as I look back, keeping Holly’s attention on me as she pulls my hand to her mouth and gives it a kiss. I don’t think she saw Amanda watching us, but she sees the question in my face.

“What?”

I draw a breath. “Why would your mom think you and Amanda were friends if she was so mean to you at school?”

“It’s kind of weird.” She says, her face twisting in a frown. “My mom never really paid much attention to anything I said to her when I was at school. I’d tell her I was being bullied, and she’d say that I should learn to fight my own battles. Looking back now, I’m sure if I’d told my dad he would have dealt with it somehow, but at the time I couldn’t see how him getting involved would make any difference. He could hardly appeal to Amanda’s father, since he didn’t want anything to do with her. And her mother wasn’t much better.”

“Martin would have fixed it. He cares about you.”

She nods. “I know. But at the time… Anyway, when I went away to Philly, it turns out Amanda and my mom started hanging out. Apparently they met at a bar where Amanda was working, and my mom of course didn’t remember that I’d ever said anything about being bullied. Second day I was back, Amanda comes around to drop in on my mom and we’re face to face. You know the first thing she said to me?”

I shake my head, dreading what I’m about to hear.

“Hey, Roly-poly Holy, you’re back.” She pulls her lips to the side and shrugs. “Like I say, I’m used to it from her, but how can my mom just let that slide? Anyway, life is too short to make a fuss.”

I let out a breath, imagining what I’d have done if I’d been there to hear that. “Sometimes, baby, you have to make a fuss. Rolling over and taking what everyone dishes out is bullshit. You know a lot of people think I’m an asshole, but I just don’t take shit from anyone and my fuse is short as fuck. You gotta take care of you.”

She nods. “I guess, Daddy.” Her eyes go wide and she glances around the restaurant. “Sorry, it just—”

“Don’t be sorry,” I growl. “Besides, you have me now to take care of you.”

“But it’s just…I don’t know. It feels right, but isn’t it a sex thing? The whole Daddy thing…”

I shake my head. “It’s our thing. Does it feel like a sex thing to you? Because it doesn’t to me.”

“No. I guess not.”

“There’s no guess. It’s you and me, babygirl. I am your Daddy, and I always will be. I’ll look after you and protect you, and make sure you have everything you need. And you’ll do as I say, or else…” I narrow my eyes and watch her shiver.

“Yes, Daddy.”

“Good girl. Now, eat up, we have to get back to the North Pole.”

Ten

Holly

“WHAT DID HE SAY?” I narrow my eyes at Cole, hoping that if he tells me again I’ll be able to work out exactly what’s going on.

I scratch my forehead, a little twinge of a headache starting. My mom messaged me to ask if I would be home soon with some money. She knows I made five-hundred dollars today, and all of a sudden the electric is about to be cut off and I need to get cash to her right away. But that’s not what’s bothering me. She can have the money. It’s something about the call Cole just received from my dad.