Everything feels different. Wrong.
And my best friend is nowhere to be seen.
“I wish I had some magic.” My mother stands, running her hands down the front of her pink and brown plaid Chanel suit. “In life, sometimes there is no magic.”
She sounds defeated. Even she understands the price I must pay to keep us safe.
Alive.
The irony brings a low chuckle vibrating in my chest.
“It’s okay,” I tell her, unconvinced it really is. “Sometimes, life chooses for us.”
The last part hits me in the chest, taking away the sardonic humor, because the truth of those words is undeniable.
Five days ago, everything seemed certain. It wasn’t what I wanted, exactly, but it was clear what I had to do. It was as it had been planned my entire life. I’d grown to accept my fate, if not numb to it, as well. Love was never in the cards. I’d never even come close to feeling that emotion outside of the familial love I have for my parents, or the love of friendship for Anna, and because of that, I was determined to do what was necessary to protect my family.
To secure our future.
What does it say about me that I’m ready to take it all back now?
“Get your things together.” My mother walks to my office door. “I’ll see you at the car. There’s only a few more hours until…” Her voice trails off, and I look at the clock on my wall. It’s nine p.m. In three hours, I will be married and will have given part of myself away — the one part I didn’t know I was saving for anyone — to the wrong man.
No, that’s not quite right.
He’s not a man.
Maxim is a man.
Alberto Messina is a thing. And soon I will be, too.
“No,” I say to my mother, and she turns as she reaches the doorway. I’ve never been defiant, never had the urge before. I never experienced those teenage rebellious years like so many humans. “I mean, yes, I’ll do it. Yes, of course. But I need time. To myself. An hour, is that too much to ask?”
I stand behind my desk, looking at the woman who has always loved me and raised me to be exactly who I am right now.
She shakes her head. “No. It’s not too much to ask.”
“Then you handle Papa. I’ll call the Messina driver to take me home. When I’m ready. I want one last hour to myself. To enjoy a glass of wine, perhaps two. Have a meal. Remember what it’s like to be human. He owes me that much.”
“He does. We do. Be home well before midnight, Seleme. If that is your choice, I’ll do everything I can to support you. I love you.”
“I will be there, Mama. I love you, too.”
As soon as she’s closed the door behind her, I pull up the regular office car service on my phone, ignoring the number for the Messinas. When they answer, I tell them where to meet me and where I will be going, planning how to slip past the guards in the next room as I feel the last of my humanity slipping away.
Nine
Maxim
THE CAR WAS LATE TONIGHT.
Nearly nine-thirty when it pulled in.
They parked in the circular drive as I watched through my binoculars, and I did not see Seleme get out.
My heart thundered in my chest as her mother and father made their way from the black sedan into the house, the front door shutting behind them and the car sitting silent.
Was she ever in the car?
Has she been at the house since I left?
I haven’t seen her. Now, seeing her parents emerge from the car without her, my head is pounding. The tightness in my gut that’s been my constant companion for days twists into painful knots. I’ve been watching her house for the better part of an hour, waiting for any sign that she’s there, but it all seems quiet.
I reach down, thinking I can relieve myself from this ache she’s created in me, but as soon as I brush my hard cock through my jeans, I recoil.
There’s nothing that will soothe me until I’m balls deep in her sweet cunt. She’s ruined me, and if I die a virgin, so be it. Because I’ll never stick my dick anywhere but inside her. I’d rather die.
I bring my hands to my head, running them back and forth before covering my face and releasing the painful breath I’ve been holding for days.
That’s it.
I can’t do this. I can’t wait for Dimitri to get me the security code.
I don’t know how, but I’m getting through that fence. I’ll tear down the gate if I have to, but I’m getting into that house. I’m going to scream her name like Marlon Brando until they kill me or the cops drag me away.