Lover (Betrothed 3)

Then we sat in silence for a long time. I stared at my husband’s visage, seeing the tightness of his jaw, the emptiness of his eyes. I knew he was troubled by the events of the day, and since nothing got him as worked up as Maddox, I knew he was the culprit behind my husband’s irritation. “What happened?”

He didn’t give an explanation. Instead, he rubbed his flattened palm across his jawline. I didn’t like him when he was angry, but he was somehow even more attractive when he brooded like that.

I continued to wait.

“Everything happened.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Hades didn’t draw out the truth like this. He held the silence because he didn’t want to admit what was going on. The longer he waited, the longer our lives would seem normal…or at least, somewhat normal. “My plans backfired. I thought I was making movements in the right direction. Instead, I got cornered.”

What was that supposed to mean?

“I thought I had Maddox taken care of…”

Anytime his name was mentioned, I felt sick to my stomach. I almost asked Hades never to say that name in my presence, but that just gave Maddox power over me. It just made me weak, made me a victim.

“He cornered Damien and me at the lab. Now that all of our competitors have been disposed of, Maddox has decided to join the business. He infiltrated my men, has me outnumbered, and now I have no choice but to let him in.”

I never foresaw anything like this happening. I couldn’t even process what he’d just told me. War meant one side had to die, not that both sides would converge together. “I don’t understand. You’re in business with him?”

He nodded. “Now we run the same drug empire together.”

There had to be something I was missing. “And when he drops his guard, you’re going to kill him?”

Hades wouldn’t look at me.

“You’re going to kill him, right?” I started to panic, started to hear the emotion in my voice. I refused to live in a world where Maddox and my husband were allies. I’d kill him myself before I let that happen.

Hades held his silence.

I used words he had said to me so many times. “Look at me.”

He resisted me at first, but he slowly turned to meet my gaze. There was sadness, apology in his look. His eyes shifted back and forth like he was fighting to keep himself from looking down at the ground.

“Tell me you’re going to kill him.”

“Baby…” He took a deep breath, visibly wincing as the air left his lungs. “I can’t.”

“Yes, you fucking can.” I slammed my hand down on the table. “We don’t forgive and forget. We don’t sweep it under the rug and pretend it never happened. You told me that we were gangsters, that we were loyal to each other. Letting him walk away is not fucking loyalty. Who are you? You are not the man I married.”

Pain moved into his gaze, as if I’d hurt him all the way down to his core. “You don’t understand…”

“I don’t understand?” I asked incredulously. “That man raped your wife. You have no idea the shit he did to me. You have no idea how he would grab me by the neck and shove my face into the mattress and then…”

Hades jumped to his feet. “Stop.” It was the first time he’d raised his voice, so it sounded like he was yelling at me. He usually commandeered a conversation simply by changing his tone. But this time, he snapped. His hand moved over his face, and he sniffed audibly, as if he were controlling his unspent tears.

I pitied him as I stared at him, but I was still enraged.

Hades was quiet for a long time as he considered what to say. He breathed hard as he battled his emotions to reach pragmatism. “I would kill him if I could. You have no idea how much I want that. But every time I made a move against him, I always lost. And if I make a move against him now… I just can’t.”

“Why not?”

He stared at the floor. “Because he’ll take you…”

My heart started to thud in my chest. All the adrenaline and anxiety came rushing back. I never thought about my time with Maddox, but I hadn’t forgotten every little detail of my captivity.

Hades continued talking. “I know he’ll make good on his threat. If I try to kill him, and I fail…I couldn’t live through that again. I barely lived through it the first time. You are the most important thing to me, and if that means I have to deal with him on a regular basis, then so be it. I will not risk you.”

I didn’t want to go through that again under any circumstances. But I didn’t want that man to be part of our lives. I didn’t want my husband to have to look at him every day. I didn’t want that asshole in my hotel, my family’s legacy. I just couldn’t accept the surrender. “I understand your decision, but we can’t live that way.”