I was hurt that my mother gave away half of our company, but I suppose there was no other way. A man would only want to be locked into marriage if he was getting something out of it.
“My second reason is children. I want a family—and you will give me beautiful children.”
That meant we had to screw…and we hadn’t screwed in so long. Would the sex still be good? Would it be awkward and uncomfortable?
“My third reason…I want to fuck you.”
Despite my indifference to him, my arms were covered with bumps like a cold breeze had just blown through. My pulse quickened further, and my tongue suddenly felt too big for my mouth. I even dropped my gaze because I was so uncomfortable by what he said. What was I supposed to say to that?
He stared me down like he expected me to say something.
I tucked my hair behind my ear then brushed my fingertips across my lips. When my arms were close to my body, I could feel my heart thudding against my arm, feel it trying to break through my rib cage. “I’m only having this conversation because my mother forced my hand. She didn’t tell me you were here…just sprung it on me. And I’m confused because anytime we’ve ever interacted in the past two years, it’s been extremely hostile.”
“I’m a hostile guy…when you get on my bad side. That’s exactly why you need me.”
If he could scare me, he could scare anyone. “Well, is that how it’s going to be every day? Hostile?”
His eyes shifted back and forth as he looked into mine. “No.”
“So…you forgive me?”
“No.”
“I don’t see how we can be partners if you can’t let go of the past.”
“I’ve let it go,” he said simply. “Doesn’t mean I have to forgive you. We don’t have to talk about it ever again. In fact, I’d prefer if we didn’t.”
Could I spend the rest of my life with a man when we had such a dark history? Our feelings were muddy and complicated. There were emotions all over the place. “I don’t want to do this. But I don’t see any other way…”
“Your mother is right. Marrying me is your best option.”
“Or I could run away and start over…”
“And leave your mother behind?” he asked coldly.
No, I couldn’t abandon her.
“You’re overthinking it. Don’t fight it.”
“But that’s what I am—a fighter.”
He stepped away and looked over the balcony at the city below. “We both know I’m the best man you’re going to find. I’m an asshole, but a harmless one. Other bachelors out there are liars, abusive, controlling…the list goes on. At least with me, you know exactly what you’re getting.”
Hades was definitely the best choice by far. Despite our uncomfortable past, he wasn’t like the others. The members of the board were jerks, and the criminals that came into the hotel wouldn’t hesitate to shank me. At least with Hades, he kept the violence away from me and didn’t hurt me himself. “I have conditions.”
He turned back to me. “As do I.”
“I don’t want you to control me, to tell me what to do. In our relationship, you did that a lot. I told you I didn’t want something, but you forced it on me anyway.”
His eyes stayed focused on me.
“When you didn’t get what you wanted, you manipulated me. I want your honesty, your integrity. I won’t tolerate a man who strikes me. If you ever hit me, I swear I’ll kill you in your sleep. I want you to treat me with respect.”
His expression softened. “Sofia, you don’t even need to ask that.”
“I’m not so sure…”
“I will always be honest with you. And I’d rather kill myself than ever hurt you.”
“That doesn’t only apply to physical pain. You hurt me when we were together.”
“Don’t act like the victim, Sofia. You hurt me too. You hurt me a hell of a lot more than I ever hurt you.”
“That was because you made me… That’s the problem. You forced me to do that.”
He looked away. “Let’s not waste time arguing about the past. We obviously have very different views of what happened. I promise you I’ll never hurt you. I will always be honest with you and respect you. Is that enough?”
“Yeah…I guess.”
“Anything else?”
“My father used to have mistresses…”
“A lot of men do,” he said quietly.
“My parents didn’t love each other, and my mother was fine with it. But I still don’t like it. That’s not the kind of marriage I want to have.”
He turned back to me, his brown eyes lighter in the gentle sunlight. “You have my fidelity, if that’s what you’re asking.”
When I saw him with that model in the lobby, I almost threw up all over the counter. “I just think that’s more appropriate, especially if we have kids at some point.” I was already talking like this was absolutely happening, like I’d already decided.