More than ever, I wanted to ignore reality, but more than ever, I couldn’t. And Diego was to blame for that.
I put my hands on his chest and pushed him away. “Drink from somewhere else, you . . . you lying, manipulative bastard.”
Diego’s eyes widened as my own shock hit. I’d never called him anything close to that before.
He raked a hand through his hair and made a fist. “Natalia. I know you must be angry—”
“You tricked me.” My heart pounded as I drew on the strength I’d started to find in my father’s study just now. “I showed up at the church like a fool thinking I was walking into eternity with you. I gave you my virginity.”
“I know—let’s just slow down,” he said, taking my hands and bringing them to his mouth. “Please. You have every right to rail at me, but first, I just need to know if you’re okay.”
His lips warmed my knuckles as they had many times before. Before, when we were shy and new at this. Before, when we’d had to hide our developing love from others. Before—when I had been his. That mouth had soothed mine, had formed words I’d never forget, and now . . . lies I’d never forgive.
“Don’t.” I yanked my hands back and turned my face away. “I can’t even look at you.”
“You know I had no choice—”
“There’s always a choice.” Cristiano’s refrain was bitter on my tongue because I hated to admit it was true. Diego’d had more of a choice than I had. He’d put his life and the lives of the people I loved on my shoulders. “You chose to make a risky deal. You chose to trade my freedom for yours.” A vision washed over me—Diego climbing up the wood lattice to my bedroom. I’d been so scared he would fall. Now I wondered if it would’ve been such a bad thing. “You came to my bedroom and stole everything from me.”
“Tali.”
I stepped back from him, resisting the pained way he said my name. “You don’t even deny it.”
He shrugged helplessly as if lost to some higher power. “I was scared if I told you what was going to happen, you’d make me leave, and we’d never get the night we deserved. I had no idea if it would be our only chance to—”
“So it’s true.” I’d hoped Cristiano was wrong, though I’d suspected he wasn’t. Hearing how Diego had plotted to deceive me made my skin crawl.
He swallowed as tears filled his eyes. “Forgive me.”
“How can I? You made one of the most important decisions of my life for me. And I’m not even talking about the wedding.” A wave of grief rolled through me, and I turned away from him. “You hurt me.”
“I know.”
The man who stood in front of me had never given me any reason not to trust him—until now. He’d wanted to know if I was okay? It was a simple question I’d answered countless times before. Too simple. Physically, I was unharmed. The last twenty-four hours had been a whirlwind of emotions from fear and anger to curiosity and even unwelcome desire. My request to Diego should’ve been straightforward—help me break free of Cristiano’s chains. But as my expectations of the Badlands had been wrong, so was my trust in Diego also weaker than it’d been the day before.
I crossed my arms and moved to look out one of the glass doors. “You don’t get to care how I am anymore.”
Silence filled the room as Diego’s eyes burned into the back of my head. “But you are okay,” he said, as if it’d just dawned on him. Relief threaded his voice. “He didn’t consummate the marriage. I knew he wouldn’t when we made the arrangement.”
My first reaction was to doubt him, but curiosity got the better of me. I glanced over my shoulder, and then turned to face him. “How could you have possibly known?”
“I put two and two together. He insisted you come to the church willingly. That extends to his bed as well.” Diego massaged his jaw, looking to the side as if thinking over his next words. “Cristiano can’t see himself as our father. He has twisted and manipulative ways of justifying his actions—even to himself.” He paused and met my eyes. “You have to stay alert at all times, Natalia.”
There was no other way to deal with Cristiano. Having a conversation with him was on par with navigating a chessboard. “I know that,” I said.
“Do you?” He peered at me. “Because he’s already coming between you and me.”
“You came between you and me,” I said.
“That’s what he wants you to think. Who benefits most from a divide between you and me? Between Costa and me? I warned you Cristiano would try to do this.”
I swallowed audibly. I’d always believed anything Diego had said. That he’d had my best interest at heart. Now, I questioned all of it.