Emerson has slept in my bed every night since that morning she let me make her come. But all we’ve done since that day is sleep. Most nights, I hold her in my arms, and occasionally we kiss. It’s PG as hell, but I don’t want to push her or make her think that she has to have sex with me. I’m content with whatever she’s comfortable with. The only thing that matters to me is making sure she’s happy and unafraid.
The thought of not caring for sex anymore almost makes me laugh out loud. Two months ago, if someone would have told me that I would be fine not having sex with a girl that I wanted to fuck and instead just cuddle, I would have told them to fuck off with their craziness. But it’s not crazy, not entirely. I’ve come to realize that there is so much more than sex. All it took was Emerson for me to see it.
I’ve made certain everyone sees us together, as an item, so we’ve been holding hands everywhere we go. I’ve even landed a kiss or two, proving to anyone and everyone that I’m playing when it comes to her. At first, people stared, but now most have stopped looking at us. Sarah and her posse of friends have left Emerson alone completely and the few times we’ve been stared at by someone else I’ve had to suppress the urge to dish out some throat punches.
I’m not violent by any means, but I won’t let any more of the fuckers at this school hurt her, or think shitty of her because of me. Instead, I’ll start knocking heads together until the asswipes get the idea.
“Who are you strangling in your head?” Vance asks, pulling me from my thoughts.
“Anyone who looks funny at Em,” I tell him as some guy kneels in front of me measuring my leg. Professional as can be, he doesn’t even react to our conversation. Then again, I wouldn’t expect any different from a man that my father hires.
Vance leans back against the leather sofa, a curious look in his eyes. “I’ve never seen you like this before… with a girl… I mean.”
“I’ve never seen you like this before either… with Ava… I mean,” I mock.
“Well I knew eventually I would find someone to hold my attention, but you’ve never, and I mean never as long as I’ve known you cared to lay claim to a girl.”
The guy in front of me measures my other leg, and I stare at myself in the mirror. The more I think about it, the more I feel like it wasn’t just Emerson who changed, who came out of her shell. It was me too.
“What changed?” Vance adds, his head tipped back and his eyes on the ceiling.
“Her. She changed me. Just like Ava changed you, Emerson changed me. Not to sound like a pussy or anything, but she made me realize there is more to life than just a quick fuck.”
“You do sound like a pussy, but I get what you’re saying.”
“Since you’re already revoking my man card for growing a heart, I should tell you that I asked her to by my girlfriend. For real this time.”
“Did you send a note asking her to mark the box next to yes, no, or maybe too?” Vance snorts, of course he couldn’t leave his asshole ways at home.
“I’m about to throw some scissors at you. I’m fucking serious.”
“What did she say?” Vance tries to sound interested, but we both know he’d rather eat glass than talk relationships with me. Too fucking bad I don’t care what he wants. Our friendship knows no bounds. I’ve seen that fucker broken, angry, drunk, you name it.
“She said that she would think about it.”
“Ouch,” Vance responds dramatically.
I can’t help but roll my eyes. “You’re a douchebag you know that, right? She’s just scared. She told me once that she’s scared of needing me and then losing me. I don’t know how to prove to her that I’m not going anywhere.”
“If you are asking me for advice, I’m afraid I don’t have any to give you. I mean, you know I don’t have the greatest track record with relationships and to be honest I’m still not sure how I got so lucky with Ava. I’m still a major asshole to everyone and I’ll probably fuck up a million times, but I guess just be there.” He shrugs. “If she thinks you’re going to run and hide, then always make sure you’re there.”
My face deadpans. “I thought you said you weren’t going to give me advice.”
“Wasn’t advice, it’s just common sense.”
“You are right, you are a major asshole.”
“That’s all you took away from that.” He shakes his head. “You’re dumber than I thought.”
Lifting my hand, I give him the middle finger.