Hurting You (Blackthorn Elite 3)

Cameron helps me straighten back up before untying my wrists. As I come down from the high, and my head and thoughts slowly clear, all the feelings I had pushed down come crashing back into me with a vengeance.

All the hurt, guilt, and fear come rushing back, threatening to swallow me whole. I can’t escape the feelings any longer. It feels like this is all my fault. Me being here, the house burning down, Grams in the hospital, that woman dying in the fire. It’s all my fault, I’m responsible for Grams, and I wasn’t there. Someone died because of me.

Even though I’m already on my knees, I can’t hold my body up. I’m too weak, too far gone mentally.

Lowering myself all the way to the ground, I curl into the fetal position and start crying like a baby. Sob after sob wrecks my body, dragging me down deeper and deeper into hopelessness.

12

Easton

My mouth pops open as I stare at Stella, huddled like a wounded animal on the floor. What the hell? Nothing ruins a perfectly good blowjob like crying. And this wasn’t just a good blowjob, this was heaven. I’ve never felt anything like this. It was pure bliss, perfection in every way, and now… she is fucking crying.

“Stella?” Cam whispers, reaching for her like she might disappear into the floor. She flinches away from him, and for the first time in my life, I’m unsure of what to do. Most would say I don’t have a heart, and they would be half right because I do have a heart, I just learned how to turn off the feeling coming with it. I’m a master at disconnecting what I feel but seeing Stella crying on the floor at my feet tugs at something inside of me.

Leaning forward, I tuck my cock back into my pants and move to the edge of the couch. Staring down at Stella, all I can make out are her soft sobs. She sounds completely defeated, and all I want to do in that moment is make her feel okay. I’m a twisted son of a bitch, but I have a weakness for this girl, one that’s probably going to come and bite me in the ass at some point.

“Sit up, Stella,” I order, a little harsher than necessary. She doesn’t move and instead starts to sob harder. Trying a different tact, I lean down, slide my arms under her body, and lift her up. I take note of the fact that she weighs barely anything at all, and a possessive urge to shove food down her throat blooms inside of my chest.

With her chin tucked into her chest, I can’t see her face, but I don’t have to see it to know that she’s broken. Like a bird with clipped wings, she can never escape us, or what happened to her.

Taking her by the chin, I gesture for Cam to hold her up. His arms replace mine, and I force her to look at me. Big eyes misted with tears meet my own, and it feels like someone has kicked me right in the fucking balls. Pure defeat reflects back at me, and I clench my jaw to hide the emotions I’m feeling.

“What’s wrong? Why are you crying? You came, did you not? I didn’t hurt you.” I force myself to keep my voice even and soft like I’m speaking to a child.

“I did, and you didn’t hurt me.” Her bottom lip wobbles and she tries to pull out of my grasp, but I pinch her chin hard, my gaze hardening. She should know better than to try and pull away by now.

“Okay, so what’s the problem?”

“Aside from the obvious fact of your house burning down,” Cam adds, and I shoot him a look which he dismisses with a smirk.

“I…I… It’s all my fault. I should have been home. I should have been with her.”

“Your grandma is sick, that’s not your fault, and you can’t always be with her, so stop blaming yourself,” I tell her the truth, but she keeps crying, probably not even hearing much of what I say.

“The doctor at the hospital said Grams needs to be put in a home. One of those fancy expensive ones where she has doctors and nurses around the clock.” Stella blinks away some of the tears and lets out a shuddering breath. “I started working here because it’s the only job I can get where I’ll be able to afford something like that for her.”

I nod, understanding her need to protect her grandmother. She’s all she has, but I refuse to let her work here, to let her show her body off to any Joe Blow that walks in this place. No fucking way. She’s ours.

“You know we won’t let you work here, right?” I reply, and the sadness in her eyes returns ten-fold. She nods her head as best she can, her lips start trembling again.