Just One Inch

But I also noticed signs of strain, bags under her eyes, lines of tension around her mouth that hadn’t been there before.

“Well, well,” I rumbled. “Look what the cat dragged in.”

“Jake,” she said quickly. “Thank you for seeing me–”

“It wasn’t me who decided to see you,” I cut her off. “Mary Beth plunked me in here with no advance warning,” I said shortly.

My tone didn’t ruffle the brunette. “Then thank you Mary Beth,” she murmured. “I just need a few minutes,” she continued, “You see, we have a daughter together.”

I couldn’t breathe for a moment.

“I’m sorry?” I said slowly. “I’m not sure I heard you correctly. Did you just say we have a child together?”

“Ye-yes,” she stammered hesitantly. I was glad at least something made the girl stumble.

“Okay … just so I understand. You’re saying that of the two times we had sex, one time my little guys swam up to one of your eggs, and made love, sweet love, resulting in a baby?” I said sarcastically. I couldn’t help it. I wanted her so badly but I also wanted her to pay for putting me through these months of misery.

“Jake, I know this is hard to take,” she said slowly. “I never meant for you to know.”

“You never meant for me to know?” I interrupted, my rage building. “You never meant to tell me that I was a fucking father?” I was livid, my anger like a force of nature as she trembled before.

“I know,” she said softly. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t think we had a future. But,” she continued quickly, “I’m here to see you now because our daughter’s sick. Our baby. Janie has leukemia.”

I felt weak and had to lean against my desk for support. The blows were coming too fast, one right after another, to my heart and to my gut.

“You’re fucking kidding me,” I said slowly. “She’s only … what, a month old? We only fucked a year ago,” I said harshly.

“Jake, please,” Tina said softly. This time I noticed tears shimmering in her eyes. “Janie has leukemia from some kind of parasite that I caught when I was cat-sitting. I’m fine and the parasite is long gone, but somehow Janie’s immune system is compromised such that abnormal white blood cells are multiplying like crazy.”

I was so stunned that I couldn’t say a word. My life, which had improved dramatically when I saw Tina in the room, had just taken another nosedive to unforeseen depths. My only child, a daughter that I didn’t even know existed, was dying or dead. My body was leaden, my mind too numb to process what was happening.

But Tina pushed on ahead. “Jake, the doctors tell me that Manning Pharma is the maker of the only drug that can save Janie. Pernacular. You know, the one that costs a thousand dollars per pop. Won’t you,” she choked, “please, won’t you give some to Janie? For your daughter?”

I was struck speechless again. This woman thought she had to beg me for a life-saving drug for our daughter? I shook my head, realizing just how low her opinion of me must be. She must have thought I was the worst fucking bastard from the ninth circle of hell, someone who would withhold life-saving treatment from his own child.

But time was of the essence. Pernacular is most effective if taken sooner, not later during the treatment regimen. “Bring me to her,” I said roughly. “Take me to my daughter.”

13

Tina

I almost cried with relief. Although Jake had said nothing about actually providing the drug, his brusque movements and curt tone on the phone assured me that Janie’s illness was his first priority.

“Martin, fire up the bird,” he said. “We’re headed to Good Samaritan Hospital in San Jose. We’ll be at the helipad in five.”

And with that, he grabbed my arm and frog-marched me to a bank of elevators in a private hallway. I didn’t try to make conversation, Jake’s face a grim mask that I was almost afraid to look at. But when the elevator doors opened and I saw that we were on top of the building with a giant helicopter waiting, I almost sighed in relief. This would get us to the hospital in ten minutes flat where surely, Jake would meet Janie and provide a supply of pills. He could leave immediately afterwards if he wanted, I wasn’t going to make him be a dad if he didn’t want to.

The bird lifted off and soon we were whirring through the air, the strange beauty of the Bay below us, choppy grey waters surrounded by marshes and developed land. I heard the pilot call into hospital traffic control and soon we landed on a helipad near the pediatric wing.

“This way,” I said after we’d disembarked, my high heels long gone, my hair a mess from the wind, my complexion ruddy. But Jake didn’t notice. The grim look on his face was still there, the skin pulled tight across those razor-sharp cheekbones, his usually mobile, expressive mouth a tight line.