Lone Wolf (The Pack 5)

“It wasn’t,” I assured him, dropping my gaze so I couldn’t be accused of ogling him. He offered me the can and I shook my head.

“I ate,” I informed him and his gaze skimmed over me.

“Not enough,” he replied, finishing off the gelatinous meat mixture and tossing the can on the ground. “I’m sorry I broke our bond without warning,” he said, surprising me. He came to the bars, hooking his wrists over them. “That wasn’t fair of me.” I moved my shoulder in a barely visible shrug, trying to pretend like it didn’t matter and he shook his head. “I didn’t want to do it.”

“You were trying to save my life,” I whispered, knowing it was true. He nodded. “Why does it hurt so much?”

He inhaled deeply, holding the breath for a long moment. “Because it’s a Pack bond, a mating bond. They aren’t taken lightly and they’re important to our mental well-being.”

“You knew it would hurt,” I mentioned, fishing for information and finally he nodded.

“I’ve experienced it before.”

“A mate bond?” I questioned sharply, a sharp pang of some unfamiliar emotion going through me. He smiled like he knew what I was feeling, but quickly shook his head no.

“A Pack bond. I’ve had to break a Pack bond before and it’s….hard,” he explained and I nodded.

“Hard is one word for it,” I commented, touching my forehead. “It’s…I feel….lost.”

“You never had a Pack,” he stated. “The mating bond between us,” he paused, searching for the right words, “It became more, it was a Pack bond too.”

“It’s gone now.” The words came out unbearably sad and he closed his eyes, sucking in a sharp breath.

“I didn’t want to do it.” I nodded, but didn’t speak. “I realized I was pulling strength from you. Dangerous amounts. Lethal.” He swallowed, his fingers restless. “I couldn’t…I couldn’t let you die. Not if I could prevent it.”

“How did you know I would survive losing the bond?” I questioned, positive there were some who had died from the painful process. I lifted my eyes to his in time to see him smile grimly.

“You are strong. So incredibly strong. Enduring the shift all these years. Living without a Pack? I knew you’d survive if only to come demand answers from me.”

“But you didn’t know you would be alive to answer them.” He shook his head and I sighed, hating my next words but needing to say them anyway. “You can leave now.” I unlocked the cage as he blinked at me in surprise. “You broke the bond.” I rolled my shoulders. “There’s no reason for you to stay now.”

He didn’t move, his stance stubborn and I lifted my hand. “You can go.”

“No.”

“Caleb. You have to go. You saw what she did tonight. You think she’s going to magically stop?” A mirthless chuckle escaped me. “This was just the beginning. It will only get worse.”

“And you know this?”

“I’ve lived it,” I answered without thinking and his eyes hardened. “Trust me, you want to go while you still can. Go be with your Pack. I’m sure they’re missing you.”

“Not without you.”

“Why? There’s no bond. You are free.”

“What if I don’t want to be free?” He contended, moving to the open door, but stopping short of walking out. “What if I want to be with you?”

“I’d think she broke you,” I muttered, staring at him like he was crazy. “Tonight should have shown you how incredibly dangerous being with me is. There is no happily ever after here, Caleb.” I moved so the door was clear but he stubbornly stayed inside the cell and my head dropped back as I sighed. “She definitely broke you.”

“She didn’t break me,” he promised, taking my hand. “But she did clarify a few things in my head.” I tilted my head back down so I could look at him. “I don’t want to live without you.” I shook my head and he shrugged. “What can I say? I kissed you and I liked it.” He tugged on my hand. “This time I want us to know what we’re doing. What it means when we give the bite.”

“You want us to….to do it again?” I asked in disbelief. “Do the whole mating bond thing again?” I yanked my hand from his and started to pace. “You have definitely lost your marbles, Captain America.”

“C’mon, Princess. Isn’t there a part of you that feels the same way? I mean you did bite me first.”

My mouth opened, but nothing came out as I pointed at him. What he said had some truth but with it came the memory of agonizing loss, a loss that rivaled only my parent’s deaths. I wasn’t sure I could survive that, not again, and there was zero guarantee it wouldn’t happen. If Caleb thought he was saving me, hell, if I thought it would save him, I’d break any bond in a heartbeat, but it would be the last thing I did.