“Ha!” Carlton scoffed. “This person doesn’t want romance at all, Officer. I think we have an aspiring porn star in our midst.”
Nathan smiled and looked at me. “What do you think, Miss Ryan?”
“I think there are plenty of other investigations you could be spending your time on right now.”
“There really aren’t,” he said, lowering his voice. “I think I should make it my mission to satisfy this particular one until the very end.”
“What happened to people asking for simple, sweet things?” Carlton asked. “Is there any of that on there?”
“The person did ask for a few of those things.” Nathan looked over the card. “A new standing mixer, new pajamas and slippers, a chance to see Cedar Falls through the eyes of a tourist, and lastly, late-night kisses down there.” He looked up. “You know, I’m starting to see a not-so-subtle pattern for what this person really wants for Christmas.”
“Me, too,” Carlton said. “Are you thinking that the late-night kisses “down there” may be an allusion to a foot fetish?”
Nathan gave him a blank stare.
“I don’t think either of us will be of any help to you during your investigation, Officer Benson,” I cleared my throat. “I’ll be sure to ask some of my friends about this later today.”
“No need for that, Miss Ryan.” He sipped his coffee. “I’m going to place the entire list in the town paper’s ‘Lost and Found’ section tomorrow morning. I know how important The Wish Tree tradition is to everyone here, so whenever we figure out who the list belongs to, I’ll be sure to post an update with the person’s picture on the front page, so everyone will know that this whole unfortunate thing was sorted out.”
My mouth fell open.
“Wait.” Carlton stood to his feet. “After thinking about it, I have a feeling some high-schoolers may be behind this, so let me make a phone call. This whole thing may be their big prank for the year.” He headed toward the door without another word, and I shook my head at Nathan.
“You know,” he said, returning the envelope to his pocket, “I think I’m far more offended at the fact that you’re out with a guy like this than the fact that you stood me up.”
“I stood you up because you deserved it.” I couldn’t believe this shit. “You also sent me a ticket for a busted tail light yesterday.”
“I told you that you had a week to get it fixed.” He smiled. “Then again, I can easily make that go away if you agree to give me the make-up dates I deserve.”
“Dates, as in plural?”
“I believe I’m owed at least four at this point.” He paused. “Unless you do want me to post your list in tomorrow’s paper, that is.”
“You wouldn’t dare …”
“I wonder how Sifted Perfection’s customers would feel knowing that the owner wants to get fucked against the same kitchen counters where she makes all of her pastries,” he said. “I also wonder if the daycares and schools you have under contract would be okay knowing that their favorite baker spends more time thinking about getting her pussy eaten than crafting new recipes.”
“That last part is only your assumption.”
“I’m willing to bet it’s not.”
“You honestly think that you can blackmail me into going out with you?” I crossed my arms. “You can’t, and just so you know, what you did by stealing from the tradition-worthy contest tree is pretty unforgivable in this town. To be honest, I’m pretty tempted to pull out my phone and call—”
“The police?” He smirked. “I’ll wait.”
I stalled, my cheeks redder than they’d ever been. “You shouldn’t have to blackmail someone to get them to go out with you.”
“Is it really blackmail, if the person knows damn well that she’s interested in going out with me?”
I said nothing as he moved his chair a bit closer to mine, as I leaned even closer to him.
The two of us stared at each other for several seconds, until I finally shattered the silence.
“I’m not sure how to feel about the town’s deputy cop being a criminal mastermind.”
“If you’re trying to change the subject, it’s not working,” he said, smiling. “I’m not kidding about posting these in the paper, and since I just saved you from one hell of a disaster date, I think you should be far more willing to agree to the dates with me.”
“This date was going amazing until you showed up.”
“Is that so?” His lips brushed against mine, and my nipples hardened. “Be honest.”
I couldn’t think straight with him so close, and a part of me wanted him to kiss me right here and now.
“I thought so,” he said, looking toward the window where Carlton was now pacing the sidewalk as he talked on the phone. “From the looks of things, I doubt he’s capable of giving you any of the things you’ve written on your wish list.” He returned his gaze to me, looking at my lips. “I’ll pick you up at eight tomorrow night.”