Pregnant with the Rancher's Baby: Reclaimed by the Rancher
Page 38
When she collapsed on top of him, Nate gently lifted her to his side to wrap her in his strong arms. As he cradled her to him, she knew in her heart that she loved him—had never stopped loving him.
But as she floated back to reality, the uncertainty of their circumstances returned full force. Had she further complicated an already complex situation?
After watching the wonder on his face when they saw their baby for the first time on the ultrasound, she had no doubt that he would be a good father and always be there for their daughter. Unfortunately, she still had her doubts about him losing interest in his relationship with her. Everything was fine for now. But they had been down this road before. Things would be going great between them and he’d suddenly decide that they needed to take a break.
There was so much she was risking that it was overwhelming. She had laid her heart on the line again. What if Nate wasn’t able to work out whatever issues he had about commitment? He had said he was ready to take that step and wanted them to get married, but of all the times he mentioned loving the baby, she couldn’t remember a single time that he had mentioned loving her. Could she take that leap of faith, knowing that he might never give her his heart as fully as she gave hers to him?
And then there was the risk of his job. She wasn’t sure her nerves could take watching him ride bulls, knowing what the price of a single mistake could be. She would never ask him to give up such a big part of who he was just because she was frightened of what might happen to him. But she wasn’t sure she could live with the risk of him being seriously injured or worse.
“What’s wrong, Jessie?” he asked gently, tipping her chin until their gazes met. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
“No,” she said, shaking her head.
“Then why are you crying?” he asked, wiping the moisture from her cheek.
“Th-that was beautiful,” she said, thinking quickly. She hadn’t even realized she was crying.
She wasn’t exactly lying. Their lovemaking had always been meaningful. But she wasn’t going to tell him that it wasn’t the reason for her tears.
“You’re beautiful,” he said, smiling. He kissed her with a tenderness that caused a fresh wave of emotion to fill her eyes. When he raised his head, he frowned. “Now why are you crying?”
“P-pregnancy hormones,” she stammered, not entirely sure they weren’t partially responsible for her unsettled feelings.
He surprised her when he nodded. “I’ve heard they can cause mood swings.”
“Where did you hear that?” she asked, grateful for the distraction from her earlier thoughts.
He chuckled as he tucked her to his side and reached to turn off the bedside lamp. “When my sisters-in-law were pregnant, my brothers all stashed tissues in their pockets like a miser stashes away cash.”
Yawning, she nodded. “That was probably a good idea.”
“I think I’ll get a few of those pocket packs to carry with me the next time I go to town,” Nate said, grinning.
“Another...good idea,” she agreed as sleep began to overtake her.
* * *
Nate listened to Jessie’s even breathing for several minutes to make sure she was asleep before he arranged a pillow behind her back for support and eased himself out of bed. Gathering his discarded clothes from the floor, he tossed them into the hamper before entering the bathroom for a quick shower.
Ten minutes later, he pulled on fresh jeans and a T-shirt, checked to make sure Jessie was still asleep and headed back downstairs to his office. He had spent the entire afternoon reading everything he could find online about pregnancy and a baby’s development. There were a few more things he needed to check out before he felt like he might have a grasp of what he could do to make things easier for Jessie through the next several months as well as what he could expect during the baby’s birth.
Picking up the pictures on his desk that the doctor had printed from the ultrasound, Nate stared at the image of his daughter. His daughter.
He swallowed hard. He was going to have a little girl. Just the thought caused his stomach to ache and his head to pound. When she got old enough to date, how in the hell was he going to keep teenage boys like he had been away from her?
A protectiveness suddenly came over him that he’d never experienced before. Now he understood what Ryder had meant about making sure he was cleaning his guns whenever Katie started dating and some pimple-faced boy came around the Blue Canyon Ranch to pay her a visit. Ryder was hoping just the sight of a couple of rifles and a shotgun or two would scare the kid into being a gentleman. Nate decided right then and there to file that idea away for future reference when his daughter got old enough for boys to start hanging around the Twin Oaks Ranch.