Kissing Kendall - Gone Wild

His words unraveled her. The tears came, hot and thick, and she sobbed until her throat felt just as ragged as her heart. Through it all, Alex held her close. He stroked her hair and murmured low words that wove a feeling of safety around them. For a second, she could almost believe that they’d all get through this, that it wasn’t really the end of Gretchen’s world, that Marley would be okay working through whatever was going on in her life, that Kendall hadn’t made a mistake when she threw all her life plans away.

By the time she lifted her head and stepped back a little, she felt completely empty of grief for the first time since she walked into that hospital. It would be back. Of course it would be back. But in that moment, she actually felt better. “Thank you.”

Alex brushed his thumbs across her cheekbones, wiping away the last of her tears. “Whatever you need, sweetheart. I’m here.”

Selfish of her to consider her heart in the midst of all this loss, but she couldn’t help it. “I never called.”

“You had other things on your mind.” He let his hands drop. “Do you want me to leave?”

Was that a trick question? Kendall let out a broken laugh. “No, Alex. I really, really don’t want you to leave. I just… My sister needs me right now, and that isn’t going to change in the next few months… or even years. I know I can’t put my life entirely on hold to help her, but I also can’t ask you to wait for me. It’s not fair to you.”

“Let me decide what’s fair to me.” He leaned back on the table, his blue eyes intense. “I’m not going to lie. It fucking hurt when you didn’t call, even if I understand the reasoning behind it now. Every single time someone has walked away from me, I’ve let them do it because chasing after them…” He shook his head. “I have my pride, you know?”

“I know,” she whispered.

“Except I don’t when it comes to you. If I have to choose between my pride and you, it’s you, Kendall. I know it’s too soon for this shit, and I know you have more than enough to deal with without worrying about me, too, but what I’m trying to say is that I’ll wait as long as it takes. I’ve never had a connection with another person the way I do with you, and I’m not willing to give it up just because things aren’t lined up ideally right from the get-go.” He shifted. “So what I’m asking you is if you’re willing to try, too?”

She couldn’t believe he was saying the things she hadn’t dared hope for. She cleared her throat, and then had to do it again. “You’ll end up resenting me.”

“I won’t.” Alex shook his head. “We just need clear communication and some time.”

A weightless feeling blossomed in her chest. “My sister bought a restaurant that needs to be completely renovated and then someone has to run it. That will take years, Alex. I don’t know if I’ll be leaving Ruby Creek anytime soon.”

He shrugged. “Maybe things will go well and I’ll end up here helping you with that.” He threw it out so casually, as if it wasn’t outside the realm of possibility. “We won’t know until we try. That’s all I’m asking, Kendall. Just try with me.” He looked away and then back to her. “Unless you don’t want to. If that’s the case, then no hard feelings. You won’t hear from me again.” It cost him to get the words out. She could see that.

“Alex.” Kendall stepped closer, looking up at him. “If you really mean it…”

“I do.”

“Then yes. Yes, I want to try.”

He wrapped his arms around her again, pulling her against his chest. “Thank fuck.”

“I missed you. It doesn’t make sense how much I missed you.” She slid her arms around his neck. “I’m glad you’re here.”

He smiled. “I have about a week before I need to be back in Dawson’s Creek. I’ll do what I can to help in the meantime.”

Her chest ached and felt melty, all at the same time. “I love you,” she blurted. “I know it’s too soon and that it’s nuts but—”

Alex cut her off with a kiss. It wasn’t a polite kiss, either. Not one designed to shut her up before she dug herself a deeper hole. No, he kissed her like he’d been waiting to hear those words his entire life and she’d just fulfilled his wish. When he finally lifted his head, she had to cling to him to keep her feet. “I love you, too. I don’t care if it’s too soon. It’s the damn truth. This is a once in a lifetime kind of connection, and I’ll do whatever it takes to ensure we have a happy future together, no matter how long I have to wait.”