No Tomorrow

“Was it peaceful?” he asks as I straighten out the living room and put Lyric’s books back on the bookshelf. “For Acorn?”

The ache returns to my chest as the vision of Acorn closing his eyes for the last time passes through my memory.

“He just kind of went to sleep. It was very quick. And just really sad.”

“At least he didn’t suffer. He was a good dog.”

I nod and head to the kitchen with an empty glass that was next to the couch. Josh follows me and leans his shoulder against the door frame, watching me fill the dishwasher.

“Did he show up?” he asks, trying to sound casual. Archie wanders in and sits in the middle of the floor, observing us with a smug expression.

“Yes.”

“And?”

“And we talked,” I answer.

“Your lipstick is smudged.”

I automatically touch my lips and wipe the corners.

“I was crying, Josh, and blowing my nose.”

“And kissing.”

My frustration jacks up. “Do you see a ring on this finger? Nope. Am I in a relationship with anyone? Nope. Do both of you put me in impossible, awkward situations because you don’t know what you want? Yup!” I push past him on my way back to the living room.

“I was trying to be patient by asking you out on a real date, Piper.”

“I know, and I appreciate that. I really do. But kissing me totally came out of left field and you know that.”

“I thought you liked it. I thought maybe you felt the same way.”

“I did like it. And to be honest, I’m really not sure how I feel about anything or anyone right now. I was open to going on a date with you to see how we felt about each other… to see if we could be more than friends.”

“Was? As in not anymore?”

“As in I have no freakin’ idea! Did you guys like plan this? To make me mental and sandwich me in your fuckedupness?” I snatch a blanket off the floor and fold it before draping it over the back of the couch.

“So he’s trying to weasel his way back in?”

“I don’t know.” I run my hands through my hair in exasperation. “He wants to meet Lyric.”

Josh leans forward and shakes his head in disbelief. “Seriously? All of a sudden now he wants to be a father? What’s he going to do? Take her to a kegger? Drag her around on tour? Spend the day with her then disappear until her eighteenth birthday?”

“All valid points,” I agree. “And definitely things I’m going to consider. But he is her father and I’m not going to keep my daughter from meeting her father. That’s not fair. She’ll resent me someday if I do that, and I’d like to keep my relationship with my daughter in a healthy place so we don’t end up like me and my parents.”

He crosses the room and grabs his coat from the closet by the front door. “I guess you’re right. I don’t want to see either of you get hurt, Piper, that’s all. I’m gonna leave the ball in your court. Your head’s always been a mess over him. I thought that shit was in the past, but now it seems like it’s back. Am I right?”

I slump into the couch, feeling defeated and shitty. I don’t want to hurt Josh’s feelings. That’s the last thing I’d ever want to do. But I can’t deny that deep inside, my heart is peeking out of the darkness hoping for Blue to come mend all its broken pieces forever.

“I’m not really sure. I told him the same thing, for the record. I also told him about you. I’m not playing games or lying to anyone.”

“I know you’re not. That’s not you.” He shoves his arms in his jacket. “I’m gonna hit the road. I’ll call you in a few days.”

“Thanks for staying with Lyric for me. It really means a lot to us.”

“Anytime,” he says as he walks out the front door. I immediately get up from the couch and lock the door behind him, then go down the hall to my room, checking on Lyric as I pass her room.

The house feels empty without Acorn. Even though he was such a quiet dog, there’s a strange, lonely silence where he once was.

“You called. I was starting to think you were going to blow me off.”

“I almost did,” I admit, stretching out across my bed. Archie pauses licking his paw to glare at me for the intrusion.

“Ouch. Brutal honesty.”

I sigh with exhaustion. “Sorry, but it’s true.”

“So what made you decide to call?”

Stupidity, most likely.

“I didn’t want to leave things just hanging. It drives me crazy when we do that.”

“Me too. We do it too much.”

“It’s definitely a pattern.”

“How’s Lyric?”

“Sad, but she seems okay. She told me tonight she wants to learn how to play the harp.”