The Ending I Want

His lips touch mine again, and I feel his erection press into my hip.

“Do you need to stand here for a moment while he goes down?” I flick a look south, my lips pushing up.

“Yeah.” He chuckles. “Tell me where we were before spankings and my erection?”

“I was thinking.”

“Oh, yeah. How’s that working out for you?”

“Quite well.” I meet his smiling eyes. “I think I should go on the rides because I dislike them.”

“Did you drink alcohol before you came out today?”

“Funny.” I stick my tongue out at him. “No, it’s on my list. I have to do something that scares me.”

“If I remember rightly, it said, do something that terrifies you to the point of pissing your pants.”

“Do you remember everything? Like literally everything?”

“Only the things that matter.”

“My list matters to you?”

“It matters to you.”

Oh. Wow. Breath is knocked from my lungs.

“So, which ride scares the shit out of you?” Liam is talking again, back to normal, while I’m still gasping for air.

“Roller coaster,” I say without hesitation. “They always look rickety and unsafe, and they take you up to stupid heights and then drop you back down at stupid speeds.”

“Roller coaster, it is then.” Liam grabs my hand and starts walking, dragging me behind him.

“Now?” I squeak.

He looks back at me but keeps walking. “Yep. If you don’t ride the roller coaster now, you won’t ever do it.”

True.

“But…what about your erection?” Okay, I said that quite loud, and it earns me a few looks.

Liam bellows out a laugh. “Down for now. Although keeping talking like that, and he’ll make another appearance.”

“Okay, well, what about food? Shouldn’t we eat first?” I’m totally stalling.

Stop stalling, Taylor.

Liam stops abruptly, and I almost crash into the back of him.

That’s when I see that we’re standing in front of a roller coaster ride.

“No one eats before a roller coaster unless they intend on puking. So, it’s decision time, Boston. We either ditch the roller coaster and go get food—even though I know you’re not hungry because we only ate an hour ago and that you’re just stalling before making another excuse, and then we’ll never end up riding this roller coaster because you’ll let your fear talk you out of it—or you can pull your big-girl knickers on and ride the fuck out of this roller coaster.”

“Big-girl knickers? Seriously, Hunter? That might be the unsexiest thing I’ve ever heard.”

He tilts his head to the side. “Seriously? Because I think you’d look hot in big knickers.”

“Really?” I blink, trying to picture that.

Nope, not working for me at all.

“Really.” He gives me a sexy smile. The look in his eyes is like he’s actually imagining me in them right now.

And, now, I’m thinking about where I can find a store in London that sells big knickers.

“But we’re saving big knickers for later,” he says.

“We are?”

“Quit stalling, Boston.” He gives me a look.

He’s right. I’m totally stalling. Again.

“Now, are we riding the fuck out of this roller coaster or not?”

I take a breath and blow it out. “We’re riding the fuck out of it.”

A smile lifts his gorgeous lips. “Good girl. And, just so you know, I intend to ride the fuck out of you later tonight.”

Sweet baby Jesus. He’s so fucking hot.

Liam gives me a quick firm kiss on the lips and grabs my hand, and then I’m moving again.

He brings us to a stop at the ticket booth. “Two tickets, please,” he tells the woman sitting in the booth.

“Twenty pounds,” she tells him.

Liam hands her a bill, and she passes him two tickets. He grabs my hand again, and we move up the walkway to the ride together.

We’ve come at the right time, as the roller coaster has just finished unloading the last lot of passengers and is starting to fill up with new ones.

So, at least I won’t be waiting around.

Even still, my heart is beating like a bitch in my chest, and I’m shitting my pants.

I know. I have a tumor literally growing in my brain, killing me—and I’m letting it…I’m doing nothing to try to stop it—but I’m afraid of a stupid roller coaster.

Doesn’t make sense, does it? But then fear isn’t exactly rational. It doesn’t let us pick and choose. It just is.

And dying to me isn’t the thing I’m afraid of. Not since I lost my family anyway.

It’s living that scares me.

Living without them—that’s what terrifies me.

Dying and being with them—that will be a welcome relief.

I stare up at the roller coaster, which looks a hell of a lot bigger and higher than it did the first time I looked up at it. It must be at least a couple of hundred feet at its highest point.

“Do you think it looks safe to you?” I whisper to Liam as we’re in line to get on.

“It’s safe.” He squeezes my hand.

If I don’t care about dying, then why do I care if this ride looks safe enough?

Because I don’t want anything to happen to Liam.

And fear, like I said, is not rational.

But it is a state of mind.

I squeeze my eyes shut and force the stupid fear out of my thoughts.

Liam tugs on my hand, and I see the ride attendant waiting to let us on the ride.