She was saving her daughter’s future. If she let him in, if he went down that path of addiction again, she didn’t know if she’d have the strength to make him leave again. Because, in all honesty, she just wanted to hold him, to make his life perfect, to heal him. Isn’t that what she did? She healed people who were broken...or, at least, that’s what she’d devoted her career to.
One day, she hoped to have her own office and run a counseling center instead of working for someone else. She loved her job, but she wanted more control and a softer atmosphere than the sterile building where she currently worked.
“I think we need to go to Gallagher’s after the meeting,” Kate stated, patting her protruding belly. “Gray will hook us up. I mean, he’ll hook you up with a margarita. I’ll stick with lemonade.”
Kate’s husband, Gray Gallagher, owned the only bar in town and they often went for ladies’ night or to enjoy a drink and some pub fries, sometimes a little dancing, too. Not only had Kate married her best friend, she was also expecting his child.
Tara shook her head. “I’m not really in the mood. Besides, I need to get home to Marley.”
“I’m surprised you came at all tonight,” Lucy responded. “Is she feeling okay?”
“She is,” Tara confirmed. “The doctor stressed that we need to keep things as normal as they were when Marley believed we were all living together like one happy family. I wanted to cancel, but Sam assured me they would be fine and we had to listen to the doctor.”
Kate reached over and squeezed Tara’s hand, offering a soft smile. “Nobody would say a word if you wanted to slip out early and head home.”
Tara wanted nothing more than to be home watching over Marley, but at the same time, she did need to do what the doctor said and she wasn’t so sure being in that house, trapped with all those memories and Sam, was the best thing for her sanity right now.
“I’ll stay,” she stated. “We’d better get the refreshments out before everyone gets here.”
Kate nodded, smoothed her shirt over her rounded belly and headed to the rear of the community center where they’d stored their goodies in a small kitchen. Lucy circled the table and propped her hip on the edge. “Why don’t I bring Emma over to play?”
Tara’s first response was to say yes, but then she thought of the timeline. “Marley didn’t know Emma when she was three.”
Kate shrugged. “Then I’ll bring her over and we’ll introduce them again. I can explain to Emma that Marley is having a tough time remembering so she needs to pretend they’ve never met. Believe me, Emma is all about acting now. She wants to try out for the local plays at the theater in town.”
Tara laughed, immediately picturing sweet Emma with her wildly curly blond hair stealing the show. “I think that’s a wonderful idea. Bring her over tomorrow for lunch. Who knows? Maybe seeing her will help trigger something.”
Thankfully it was summer break and Tara didn’t have to worry about school, teachers and other kids confusing Marley. Her accident had taken place on the last day of a summer program Tara had signed Marley up for.
When people started to wander in, Tara immediately greeted them, trying her best to get back to her normal life. She had to keep telling herself she could and would get through this difficult time. This was a grief share group, after all, so what better place for her to be? She had no clue how to deal with all of the juxtaposition of emotions. Honestly, she couldn’t even name all of them at this early stage in the game.
No. None of this was a game. Having the past year wiped from her daughter’s memory and having her soon-to-be-ex living with her again was very much real.
Maybe she did need a girls’ night out. Perhaps purging all of her thoughts would be the therapeutic balm she needed right now. Being with her two very best friends would definitely be the comfort she needed.
There was no way she could express her fears and her concerns to Sam. He’d always been the one she’d turned to, but not since he’d shattered the trust between them.
Tara vowed after the meeting to talk with Kate and Lucy about getting together for some adult time. Even if it was thirty minutes over a quick lunch, Tara had to talk to someone about the crippling fear of the unknown where Marley was concerned...and the man who was posing as her loving husband.