“We have. I can’t wait. Don’t want to wait.” Gray eyes locked on blue. “Be in me,” she said. “Be with me. Now, Jake.”
“Now,” he agreed and pushed his body into hers, sheathing himself so deeply that Cass gasped at the strength of his possession. She’d forgotten—or tried to forget—what it was like with Jake. How she lost herself in him. How her body became his. How he could make her want and feel so much more than she ever had before.
And now she had him inside her again and it was so right. So good. She wanted it to never end. She moved with him, and when he rolled over onto his back, she was astride him, taking him even deeper as she moved on him.
She watched the firelight play across his sculpted muscles. Watched her own hands stroke his skin and watched him squirm in response. He clenched his hands at her waist as he urged her into a faster pace. She rocked on him, throwing her head back, feeling like some wild warrior queen with him beneath her. And when her body trembled, letting her know the release was coming, she looked into his eyes, drowning in that deep, lake-blue.
She called his name as her body splintered and heard his hoarse shout moments later as he emptied himself into her.
When it was over, when her body was humming and replete, Cass slumped across Jake’s chest and never wanted to move again.
“So,” he whispered, waiting until she lifted her head to look at him. “Wrong time to ask, but you wouldn’t be on the pill, would you?”
Her forehead hit his chest as the implications of that question slapped her. “No. I’m not.”
“Doesn’t matter,” he said and that got her attention.
“Doesn’t— What do you—how can it not matter?”
“We’ve got one kid. Would one more be so bad?”
Her heart hurt at the words. She’d always wanted a big family and in her mind, she could see her and Jake and the crowd of kids they would make living on this ranch. Plenty of room for children to run and they’d have horses and dogs and two parents who—didn’t love each other? No. The dream images popped like soap bubbles.
How was it possible for her body to feel so good and her heart and mind to be steeped in misery? Propping herself up on her forearms, she looked down at him and shook her head. “We don’t know what’s going to happen between us, Jake. We can’t go making another baby.”
“Too late to worry about that now,” he reminded her. “In fact, I hope you are pregnant.”
Surprised, she blurted, “You can’t be serious.”
“Damn straight I am.” He hooked one arm around her waist and rolled, pinning her beneath him. Looking down into her eyes, he said, “If you are, then this time I’ll see my child grow in you. I’ll be there when he’s born—not hear about it five months later.”
“And then what, Jake?” She shook her head slowly. “It wouldn’t solve anything. It would just be more...complicated.”
Jake’s gaze shifted slightly and she wanted desperately to know what he was thinking, feeling. But the wall was up again and she was on the wrong side.
“Maybe,” he said quietly, “but you’d have to stay here. With me. That, at least, would be settled.”
She stared up at him for what felt like forever before saying, “Instead of just asking me to stay, you’d prefer to trap me. Or order me.”
Scowling, he reminded her, “I asked you to marry me.”
“You told me to marry you. There’s a difference.”
“You’re trying to make this romantic. A love story,” he muttered, and idly stroked a lock of her hair back from her face. “It’s not, Cassie. It’s two people who work well together finding common ground.”
She caught his hand in hers and wished it was as easy to take hold of his heart. But looking into his eyes, she saw it was over. For her, it was done.
He wouldn’t be what she needed. Wouldn’t be the man he could be—just by opening his heart. So she couldn’t stay. Couldn’t risk him one day walking away as her father had done. Cass wouldn’t put herself through that kind of loss again, and Luke would never know what it felt like to have his father turn his back and leave him behind.
She had to say it now, while she had the nerve. While she could force the words from her throat because the threat to her heart was so real. So immediate. “When the road’s clear, I’m taking Luke and going back to Boston.”