“I’ve made us a drink,” he said. “It’s downstairs.”
“I was going to go to bed. I’m tired.”
“You’re a coward, Rachel. You’re too worried you’ll fall into bed with me, is that it?” he asked.
“Not at all. I’ve got no feelings for you whatsoever.”
He chuckled. “You’re an awful liar.”
“I know.” She slapped a hand across her mouth. “I wasn’t lying.”
“We shall see, won’t we? Amuse me. Come and sit with me. It’s still early.”
“It has been a long week,” she said. “I’ve got to head out tomorrow, shopping for the potluck. Our fridge is bare.”
“I can do that,” he said.
“You go out and shop for ordinary groceries? Don’t you have someone to do the job for you back in the city?”
“I have someone to do everything for me. It makes my life easier.”
“See?” she said. “I can do it. It’s not a problem. Honestly, this is not my first potluck.”
He put his hands on her shoulders and moved her away from the kitchen and into the sitting room. He’d already lit some candles to relieve the tension in the room. The lights were lowered, and he tried to create the perfect ambiance for their evening. He didn’t expect sex or her to give into him. No, this was for them both to just be able to sit, relax, and enjoy.
All he’d been wanting to do since he got here was enjoy her company like he used to. They would sit for hours before their wedding day, talking, laughing. He did miss their time together, more than he cared to admit.
She always made him laugh, and her own was infectious. He couldn’t get enough of her. Five years was a long time to go without being with her. He didn’t even realize how much he’d missed her until recently.
Grabbing their hot chocolates, which he’d made perfectly now, he joined her, sitting beside her, close but not too much, to give her space, and for her to not feel like he was invading it.
She took a sip of the hot chocolate and let out a moan. “Perfect. You learned how to make it.”
“I’ve been working on it all week so I could show off to you.”
She chuckled. “This is nice.”
“It is. Besides the potluck prep tomorrow, what else are you doing?”
“Nothing else. Benjamin’s home tomorrow. He usually helps me in the kitchen so I’m not running behind.”
“We made a really good son.”
“The best,” she said. “He’s the one good part of the two of us.”
“I don’t think he’s the only good we’ve got together.”
“We can’t be in the same room with each other for longer than a few minutes without one of us going crazy at the other.”
He shrugged. “If you really think about it, we’ve never really tried.”
“What do you mean?”
“This is the first time we’ve sat down. You’re not angry at me. I’m not trying to prove you wrong or force you to stay with me. We’re just two people, enjoying time.” He took a sip of his chocolate. “And you’re right. I totally did rock this chocolate.”
“I didn’t say rock,” she said, laughing again.
“I missed this.”
“This?”
“You and me, talking, being together. We used to do this all the time.”
“I’m sure you’ve had a lot more interesting things to do than think about our conversations. We never really talked about anything deep and meaningful.”
“They meant something to me. We always talked about our plans for the future. How we wanted a big family.”
“I talked the most,” she said. “I recall mentioning the whole big family with a dozen kids.”
“Don’t you want that still?” he asked.
“What I want doesn’t matter. Wants and desires change all the time. I know I’ve changed.”
He couldn’t resist reaching out to stroke a curl behind her cheek. Rather than linger, he pulled back and drank his hot chocolate.
“If you were given the chance of having a dozen kids, of being able to fill this house, way too much with boys and girls, would you take it?” he asked.
“I can’t answer that,” she said.
“Why not? It’s a simple enough question.”
“Fine. If I was to adopt, then yes, I could see it happening.”
“Wait, why would it have to be adoption?” he asked.
“I only ever saw myself having a dozen kids with the guy I was crazy about. My life has changed.”
“You’re not crazy about me anymore? I mean seriously, no joking around.”
“Does it matter what I feel?” she asked.
“I can give you what you want.”
“No, you can’t.” She didn’t make a move to leave even as her voice got a little angrier. “We’ve changed, Wolfe. We’re not the same people.”
“You’re telling me when I do this, you don’t feel anything?” He cupped her cheek, stroking his thumb across her plump lips. They were so kissable and tempting. He’d thought about them many times wrapped around his cock as he pumped into her mouth.