“Fuck.”
“Is it really so bad to live without money?” she asked. She’d never been rich or even well off. Money had always been a sore and uncomfortable topic at home. Nothing would ever change that. Her parents were always wanting to make more. It was one of the many reasons she was home alone. Not that it was a problem. She knew her parents were trying to make a good life for her. They didn’t want her to go without, even though she didn’t care about money. She never needed a brand-new phone or a new car.
Sean often drove her to school or she walked. It wasn’t a big deal.
“It’s okay for you. You know what it’s like to live without it. I don’t know that feeling. I’ve never experienced it.”
“Oh,” she said.
“Fuck, I don’t mean it as a bad thing.” He ran a hand down his face, looking increasingly frustrated. “I … you…”
“I get it, Drake. I do.” She couldn’t even be mad at him. He didn’t understand. He’d never been without money. “I can promise you, it’s not a scary thing. At least, not how you’re treating it. I survived.”
“That’s the thing, Pru, I don’t want us to survive.”
“So, we continue on with the path we’ve chosen.” She didn’t have anything else to say. “I don’t want to fight and no matter what, when we talk about the future or the past, we always do.”
“Pru?”
“We’ve only got a couple of days here. Let’s make the most of them. Can’t we at least do that right together?” she asked.
She saw he wanted to argue. In the time they had spent together, she had started to read his many tells. It saddened her how things were turning out between them. There was no future between them and of course, like always, she was trying to make it work. She had to learn to accept there was no way they could be together. They both wanted different things and even as they wanted each other, there were too many differences between them to make this work the way she wanted to.
It was time to just enjoy and to stop trying to change the outcome of their inevitable future.
****
Once again, the walk across the beach didn’t go to plan for Drake. He wanted to make this romantic but when their future was set to change in a matter of months, which neither of them wanted, it caused a few difficulties.
Arriving back at the house, Pru went into the kitchen and made them some food while he paced the sitting room.
He’d never been without luxury of some kind. It was second nature to him. Running his fingers through his hair, he tried to think of how to fix this mess. Why couldn’t he not fuck this up? No matter what he did or where he turned, he seemed to be constantly making a mess.
This is why it’s never going to work long-term.
Why not?
We don’t have to fuck this up.
Needing to see her, he moved toward the kitchen. He stood in the doorway and her back was to him, so he only got to watch her. She stood at the counter, chopping away at something, he didn’t know what. When he’d checked out the fridge, he saw it had an abundance of vegetables so he imagined they were having lots of them.
Not that it mattered.
He heard her sniffle and he couldn’t help but tense up.
She turned away from the counter and sure enough, she washed her hands, grabbed some tissues and clearly not realizing he was watching her, she sobbed into the tissue.
His heart fucking broke. “Please don’t cry.”
She gasped as she pulled down the tissue. “You’re not supposed to see this.”
“It’s kind of hard not to see it even with you trying to hide your face.”
“I’m fine. You don’t have to worry.”
“Stop trying to hide everything from me. I know I caused this.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t want to talk to you right now.”
“I know I’ve upset you.”
“It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine. Stop pretending everything is fine.”
“What do you want me to say? Look what you did to me? This isn’t supposed to be complicated, Drake. We keep saying the same old thing and we’re not getting over it.” She sighed. “I don’t want to argue with you. Not anymore. I think you should take me back home. It will be for the best.”
“No, I won’t.” He stepped right up to her, pulling her in his arms. “We’re not going to let this go. We’re going to resolve it.”
“How can we possibly resolve anything? We keep coming back to the same thing. Can’t you see we’re constantly going around in circles?”
“We don’t have to be. We’ve got to learn to compromise.”
She sighed then laughed. “You think I don’t know how to compromise? Look around you, Drake. This is me compromising. I’m not at home alone, or with Sean. I know you hate me talking about him, but tough. Live with it. I have to live with your hatred of him. You think he’s such a bad person, but I can promise you he is far from anything bad. He’s one of the best guys I know.”