He started the car and turned on a news talk station. “I want to get caught up on the financial news. Back to work tomorrow morning, you know.”
Anna leaned her head against the car window. Back to work. “Yes. I know.”
Five hours later, they were pulling up in front of her building. “Let me get your door,” he said, reaching for the handle on his own.
“No. Hold on.” She grabbed his forearm. “I feel like we should talk.” She probably should’ve brought this up during the ride, but she’d chickened out every time. Maybe this was better. At least she had an escape.
Jacob shut off the radio and turned to her. “Yes. Of course.”
“I had a really wonderful weekend,” she started, already feeling remorseful about what she was about to say. It was the smart thing to do, the right thing to do. It was also the last thing she wanted to do.
“Good. I’m glad. I did, too.”
“It’s just that...” she sighed deeply. “I like you a lot, but we need to be honest with ourselves. It probably wasn’t the smartest thing in the world, considering that we have my family to contend with. I don’t see Adam changing his mind any time soon, possibly ever, and my family is really important to me. I just think it will cause a rift that won’t be good for me. Or you, for that matter.”
“I see.” He took his sunglasses out of the cup holder and put them on. “Whatever you want, Anna. You won’t get an argument from me.”
Was he hurt? Disappointed? His voice was so cold, his tone so aloof, it was impossible to know, but she had a pretty good guess. The night before, everything she’d dreamed of all those years ago, had been nothing but a one-night stand to him. “Okay. Great. I guess I’ll talk to you at some point? About Sunny Side?”
He nodded, looking straight ahead through the windshield. “I’ll call you if I have any information to share.”
“Perfect.” She climbed out of the car, closed the door and didn’t look back.
This was for the best, but it felt absolutely wretched.
Eight
Telling Jacob “thanks, but no thanks” was the hardest thing Anna had done in a very long time. Four days later and it felt downright stupid.
“Still nothing from, you know, him?” Holly asked, setting a salad down on Anna’s desk. They’d taken to eating lunches together in Anna’s office since the executive dining room was no fun. Rumors of a LangTel takeover were rampant, but if it was happening, the perpetrator hadn’t come to light.
“Shhh,” Anna admonished, leaping out of her seat and making sure her door was firmly closed.
“It’s not like I said his name.” Holly dug into her own salad as if they were discussing the five-day forecast.
“Sorry,” Anna whispered, heading back to her desk. “It’s just, you know. If Adam found out, he would not be happy. You’re literally the only person on the planet who knows about it.”
“I feel so privileged to have this information that could get me fired.”
“I’m sorry. I hope this isn’t bothering you to know. I just had to tell somebody or I was going to go insane. And like it or not, you’re my best friend.”
“Don’t worry. I’m very good at keeping my mouth shut.”
Anna sighed. “To answer your question, no, I haven’t heard from him, and it’s been four days. I don’t know why, but I can’t stop thinking about him.” Of course she couldn’t stop thinking about him. It’d been an aeon since she’d felt so alive. But she’d made the sensible decision, choosing to put her career and family at center stage. Those were things she could rely on. Those were things that couldn’t be yanked out from under her. After the last year, she needed to know that she was standing on solid ground, even if this particular patch of land still left her wanting more of Jacob.
“Sex will do that to a person, you know,” Holly quipped. “Especially if you’ve gone long enough without it.”
It was more than sex, though. She couldn’t bring herself to utter those words, especially not to Holly, the woman of zero filter, but it was the truth. Anna hadn’t had that kind of connection with a man, well, ever. Perhaps it was the shared history between herself and Jacob, everything she’d spent years anticipating and thinking she’d never have, but it felt even more elemental than that. They fit together—shared dreams, similar mind-sets and aspirations. The physical fit was certainly impossible to ignore. In bed, the fit was mind-blowing. “I guess. Not much I can do about it, though. The drama of my family is too much, and he seemed all too ready to agree.”