Avoiding Temptation (Avoiding 3)

“I suppose so.”

“It’s kind of strange, having my own place again. Really…quiet,” he said.

Lexi nodded. She had never had her own place before. All through college and graduate school, she’d had roommates, and now, she lived with Ramsey. She could imagine a world without other people being very quiet, especially after living with someone like Bekah.

“You should come see it sometime.”

“Yeah, sure,” she said because, God, did she feel bad for him.

This was not a feeling she was used to. Jack was supposed to be in control. She had a hard time grasping the person in front of her.

And then, his eyes met hers, and she remembered. He was still Jack.

“How are the divorce proceedings?” Lexi asked about the elephant in the room.

Jack shrugged again. “Richard says that things are going smoothly. He got them to agree to mediation.”

“That’s great! If you can settle this out of court, it will be better.”

“I guess. That’s what he keeps telling me.”

“When does that begin?”

Jack laughed sardonically. “This afternoon actually. I’m supposed to meet Richard after this to go over our case and how they want to handle proceedings. Then, we’re heading straight into mediation.”

“Well, good luck. What kind of outcome does he want?”

“Fifty-fifty split,” he told her.

But something in his posture showed her that he was thinking something else. She just wanted to reach out to him, but she didn’t dare move.

“What do you want?” she whispered.

“I thought I wanted my wife back,” Jack answered honestly.

Lexi couldn’t help but cringe. Bekah and the word wife had never sat well with Lexi. It certainly didn’t now when the Bitch was working so hard against him.

“You thought?”

“I feel kind of like an idiot that I didn’t see it before.”

“What?” Lexi asked.

“Bekah is kind of a bitch.”

“Kind of?” Lexi asked, laughing.

“Am I late to the game on that one?” he asked sheepishly.

“Way late.”

“I’m not sure how I missed it. When we were dating…” Jack trailed off, shaking his head. “You probably don’t want to hear this.”

Lexi sighed softly. Jack needed her. He didn’t have anyone else, and if he needed to rant about Bekah, Lexi could oblige him. She didn’t even like to think about Bekah. At least if she got to add a jab in there every now and again, then it might be worth it.

She forced herself to continue. “You can talk to me.”

“You know that you’re something wonderful, right?” he asked, staring up at her, from across the table.

Her heart jumped out of her chest, and she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. Looking at her like that should be outlawed. It wasn’t fair that he still had that much control over her body.

“Um…thanks.”

“You and your obsession with your hair…”

“It has a calming effect!”

Jack laughed. “I’m just messing with you. I like it. It tells me what you’re thinking without having to ask.”

“You know what I’m thinking anyway.” At least, it always felt like that.

“I’m pretty sure if I knew what you were thinking without asking, I wouldn’t have been such a f**k-up,” he said.

Silence lingered between them as Lexi stared back at him. He was not making this easy. Part of being around Jack was so easy. He just got her. They had been around each other so long that she didn’t have to explain herself. In the past, he had known exactly when and where to touch her. He had known her. But then, there were things about Jack that were so difficult, such as his need to always pick someone else, the heavy weight of their history, the hint of desire that always sprang up between them, unbidden, at the most inopportune moments. So much was there between them, swirling around, that at times, it felt suffocating. And Lexi just wished she could see past those emotions.

The waiter interrupted them by dropping off drinks and taking their orders. Lexi wasn’t that hungry to begin with, and the turn of the conversation didn’t seem to help.

When the waiter disappeared, Jack started talking again. “We got off track. What I was saying before is that when Bekah and I were dating, she was a really different person, to me at least. She was sweet and sincere and acted like she loved me. We were together all the time. I was hesitant about marrying her. I was worried that she was into me a bit more than I was into her.”

Lexi ground her teeth together. She wanted to shake him. She wanted to reach over the table and slap some sense into him. Didn’t he know what he had done by being so stupid? Argh! It just made her blood boil.

“Then, we got married, and things were all right for a while. We both had to adjust to living together and our new life. I guess you could call it the honeymoon effect, but then something happened. It changed. She stopped caring about me, about anything. I don’t know what happened. Maybe she just decided that she had made a mistake. In any case, she wasn’t the same person that I’d met. And she’s even worse than that now.”

“Then, I guess this divorce is for the better,” Lexi said softly.

Lexi knew that it was. She had known that he shouldn’t have ever married Bekah, but Lexi couldn’t change the past any more than he could.

“Lexi, the worst part about it all is that I really tried to make it work.”

“I know, Jack,” she whispered.

“How do you know?”

“I was there through it,” she reminded him.

“But there’s something more to that statement.” He pointed at her, like he was trying to figure out what she was hiding behind her big brown eyes. “Isn’t there?”

“It’s just…Jack, you would try to make a marriage work even if it was all wrong.”

“Why would you say that?” he asked, his eyes icing over.

He didn’t want to hear what she was dishing out.

“Because you did it with all of your other girlfriends.”

Jack’s eyes hardened. “There’s nothing wrong with trying to make things work with someone.”

“There is when they’re all wrong for you,” Lexi couldn’t help but shoot back.