Savage Hearts

I’ve never used full force before—sparring on the mats at the gym we were taught to hold back to keep from knocking our partner unconscious—and I’m shocked at how quickly she goes limp in my arms.

It takes maybe seven, eight seconds at most and then I’m guiding her carefully to the floor. I take a moment to look up and see that J.D. and Jeremy are flat on their backs and Danny is already jabbing a needle into Jeremy’s thigh, before turning back to Rosa. I inject her with a much smaller dose of ketamine as gently as I can, not wanting to cause her any more pain, even if she is unconscious, and then sit back on my heels. Danny finishes delivering J.D.’s injection and looks up, meeting my gaze across the bodies littering the floor.

We’re both still for a moment, catching our breath, and then Danny reaches down, grabs the car keys from where they’ve fallen, and tosses them my way.

I catch them with a steady hand.

“I’ll get these two into the trunk,” he says. “You want to pull their car out of the driveway so I can get out?”

I nod, loving him even more for knowing I need to keep this all business. There’s no time for a post-mortem about the events of tonight until after it’s all over.

And maybe not even then.

Maybe this is one of those things that we’ll put to bed and never speak of again, like the time I kissed another boy at a graduation party, or last summer when Danny got drunk and said hurtful things that could ruin us if we gave those memories too much air and sunlight.

Some things are meant to be locked away in the dark and starved of attention until they all but disappear.

But before we can lock them away, we have to see this through.

I stand. “I’ll get Rosa taken care of and meet you at the site.”

“All right,” he says. “Do you need me to come back in and help you get her into the trunk?”

“Nope,” I say. “She’s light and it’s better for you to go. We don’t want those two waking up before you get out of town. I’ll text you after I’ve dropped her off. If you don’t hear from me in thirty minutes, start without me.”

“I’m not starting without you,” he says, kneeling and picking up J.D. with a soft grunt. “If there are people outside her apartment, leave her on the street somewhere and call 911 to let the cops know where she is. The emergency number is the same here as it is in the states.”

“I’m not going to leave her unconscious on the street,” I say, knowing what can happen to women who are left alone and defenseless even for a few minutes. “I’ll get her inside her building, and into her apartment if I can figure out which is hers, and I’ll get to you as fast as I can.”

With a resigned sigh, Danny carries J.D. into the garage. I pull their rental car out to the street and head back inside. While Danny loads Jeremy into the trunk beside J.D., I hustle into the living room and turn off the music before grabbing the bleach spray we bought and mopping up the blood smeared across the floor near Jeremy’s head. J.D. and Rosa didn’t make a mess so all that’s left to do is lock up and get Rosa loaded into the trunk.

As I walk back to the curb to fetch the car, Danny is already backing down the drive. He pulls out into the street and shifts gears, heading off into the night without any parting words out his open window.

I know he thinks I’m taking an unnecessary risk with Rosa, but I have to make sure she’s safe.

My revenge will not claim any innocent lives. And Rosa is innocent, no matter what kind of life she’s chosen to lead. No woman, virgin or whore or anything in between, deserves to have her autonomy taken away. Our bodies belong to us and they are all equally valuable and sacred. I’ve used Rosa, but I won’t abuse her, or leave her vulnerable to anyone else’s abuse.

Carefully, I carry her into the garage and tuck her into the trunk. She’s breathing easy, but I make sure to lay her on her side. I read that some people can have trouble breathing after a ketamine injection and it’s better to be safe than sorry. I leave the key in the drop box by the front door where the rental agreement said to leave it and get back in the car. No one will be by to check on the house until after checkout time at ten tomorrow morning, and no one will be able to say that Danny and I didn’t spend the night here.