‘And from the fact that you’ve been like a bear with a sore head ever since she left.’
‘I did not look at Eleanore a certain way and I’ve been busy.’ He turned back to his computer to emphasise the point.
‘You’re always busy but you’re never difficult to work for. I remember telling Eleanore that I loved working for you. Right now I want to quit.’
Lukas blinked at his PA. ‘You can’t quit.’
‘And I’m not the only one.’ She continued on as if he hadn’t even spoken. ‘You’ve been barking at the staff for two weeks. Nothing is good enough for you.’
‘Maybe my standards have been raised.’
‘I certainly hope so. I’ve never approved of the other women you’ve dated.’
‘I wasn’t talking about my personal life and I did not date Eleanore Harrington.’
‘Then maybe you should,’ she huffed. ‘Anything is better than living in this space.’
Lukas surveyed his luxurious office. ‘You have a problem with my office?’
‘I meant your mental space.’ Her voice softened. ‘It’s not healthy, Lukas. I worry for you.’
‘You’re not my mother, Petra. You’re my PA.’
She sniffed. ‘I’m sorry I care.’ When she turned and stalked from the room Lukas searched his desk for something to throw.
Der’mo.
He glanced up at the image of Eleanore smiling on his screen. Had he fallen in love with her? It didn’t seem possible but every single muscle in his body bunched at the thought and his heart kicked painfully behind his breastbone.
There was no denying she had somehow profoundly changed him. The usual solace he found in his work had been missing ever since she’d come into his life and lately he’d even found himself unintentionally preparing his own list of goals in his head. Always in those unconscious moments the number-one position was family and number two was Eleanore.
Usually at that point he’d deliberately bring to mind the sick sense of desolation he’d felt when Eleanore had chosen her work over him which was usually when he replaced that emotion with anger. At himself.
He tapped his fingers rhythmically on his desk. The only other time he’d felt that depth of despair was when he’d been twelve years old and he’d found his mother on a normal city street. After that he’d vowed he’d never chase another woman again.
Was that what he was thinking of doing now? Chasing Eleanore? He pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes. His future yawned in front of him. A future without Eleanore in it. A heavy coldness seeped into his bones and he was once again that fearful little boy all alone on the train to Moscow.
Only he wasn’t that boy any more. He was a man. A man who had choices. A man who had fallen in love with a beautiful woman who was too good for him. It was unexplainable and unwanted but there it was.
Love. He let the word roll around inside his head for a bit. Tapped his desk some more. He saw Eleanore with the kitten, the way her face softened with tenderness. He saw the way she looked when she climaxed. The way she had looked at him when he kissed her. He thought about how much she made him laugh.
He swore and shoved his chair back from his desk. He had no idea if she really wanted him in her life. He had no idea if she would reorder her list of goals for him but he knew he had to try.
He stopped beside Petra’s desk. She didn’t look up. ‘I apologise.’
She sniffed again.
Lukas smiled. Clearly females with attitude were his specialty and he hadn’t even realised it. ‘Would it make you feel better if I ask you to organise the jet to fly me to New York?’
This time she looked up. ‘Infinitely.’
* * *
Was five o’clock too early for wine?
Eleanore kicked off her high heels and sighed as her feet sank into the deep carpet. Lucky wound his way between her legs. ‘Hello, baby,’ she crooned. ‘Miss me?’
He purred and she picked him up. She discarded her suit jacket on the bed. Lucky rolled around on the duvet as she changed into old sweats and an even older Cornell sweater and finished the ensemble off with a pair of ratty old socks that were soft and warm. Then she carried Lucky into the kitchen and checked the circular wall clock that was designed to look like an old fob watch.
No, five o’clock was definitely not too early for wine.
‘Not that you want wine, I know that.’ She picked up the empty saucer of milk from the floor and refilled it with the special kitten milk from the pet shop.