Living the Charade

She sniffed back tears and wondered if she had time to put her casual clothes on. And then she wondered what was taking so long. Surely she’d been sitting on the tarmac for over an hour now?

The whoosh of the outer doors opening brought her head round, and she was startled to see Valentino’s broad shoulders filling the doorway.

Like her, he hadn’t taken the time to change, and he looked impossibly virile: his bow tie was hanging loosely around his neck and the top buttons of his dress shirt were reefed open.

Miller swallowed, her heart thumping in her chest. ‘What are you doing here?’

Valentino stalked inside the small cabin. ‘Looking for you. And I have to say this is the last place I tried.’

‘I told Mickey not to tell you.’

‘He didn’t. My pilot did.’

He looked annoyed.

‘I’m sorry if you’re upset about me commandeering your plane at this hour. I felt terrible doing it. But all the hotel rooms were booked and Mickey insisted...’

‘I don’t care about the plane. And stop moving.’ Miller stopped when she realised she was stepping backwards. ‘Where are you going, anyway?’

‘The pilot stowed my bag in the rear cupboard. I was just going to get it.’

‘Leave the damn bag.’ He dragged a hand through his hair and Miller realised how tired he looked.

She swallowed heavily. ‘Why were you looking for me?’

Had she forgotten something? Left something in their room?

‘Because I realised after you left that I loved you and I needed to tell you.’

‘You...what?’

He came towards her again and Miller’s back bumped the cabin wall. Her senses were stunned at his announcement.

Valentino stepped into her personal space and cupped her elbows in his hands. ‘You heard right. I love you, Miller. I’ve spent my whole life convincing myself it was the last thing I wanted, but fortunately you came along and proved me wrong.’

Miller tried to still her galloping heart. ‘You told me that racing was all you ever needed.’

‘Which shows you that you need to add stupidity to my list of flaws.’

‘I might have been a bit harsh earlier.’

‘No, you weren’t.’ He hesitated. ‘After my father died I was determined never to love anyone because I convinced myself that I wanted to protect them from the hurt I had experienced. But you were right. I was protecting myself.’ He shook his head. ‘Until you came into my life, Miller, I truly believed that I didn’t have the capacity to love anyone.’

Miller felt her heart swell in her chest. She desperately wanted to believe that he loved her but her old fears wouldn’t let go.

He squeezed her hands gently. ‘You’re thinking something. What is it?’

‘I thought you always knew what I was thinking?’ Miller smiled weakly at her attempt at humour.

‘Usually I do, but right now...I’m too scared to guess.’

Scared? Valentino was scared?

His admission was raw, and unbridled hope sparked deep inside her. ‘You risk your life every time you race.’

He laughed. ‘That’s nothing compared to this. Now tell me what you’re thinking, baby.’

Miller felt as if her heart had a tractor beam of sunlight shining right at it at the softness of his tone. ‘I’m thinking that I may never outgrow my need for certainty, and I don’t know if I can watch you throw yourself around a track every other week without making you feel guilty. Watching you qualify today, I thought I was going to throw up.’

‘You won’t have to do either. I’ve organised a meeting first thing tomorrow morning to announce my retirement from the circuit. Effective immediately.’

Miller didn’t try to hide her shock. ‘Why would you do that? You love racing.’

‘I love you more.’

His words made her heart leap. ‘But what will you do instead?’

‘Andy and I have a patent over the new go-cart designs and we have visions of taking Go Wild global. I like your idea of turning it into a venue for corporations to use and I’m also thinking we can use it as a place to give kids interested in competing some personal coaching.’

Miller nodded. ‘That’s a great idea.’

Valentino blew out a breath as if her opinion really mattered. ‘Good. I’m glad you like it. In fact, I was hoping to convince you to consult for us. Andy and I know a lot about cars, but we know jack about running a business.’